


Twice Upon A Time

by Elise_Madrid



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Alternate Reality, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-19
Updated: 2011-05-19
Packaged: 2017-10-19 14:22:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 33,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/201814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elise_Madrid/pseuds/Elise_Madrid
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Once upon a time, Jim Kirk had to kill his best friend. Twice upon a time.......</p>
            </blockquote>





	Twice Upon A Time

**Author's Note:**

> Originally published in Legends 2, by MKASHEF Enterprises. (2002)

Gary Mitchell pulled his shirt off, flopped down on the bed and kicked off his boots. He lay back, trying to forget the horror of what he had done, to forget that he had tried to take over the ship, kill his closest friend. And if it hadn’t been for their science officer’s quick thinking, he would have. Or Kirk would have killed him, if he could.

His captain had tried. Mitchell had the bruises to prove it. A few more minutes and one of them would have been dead. Just like Elizabeth...just like Kelso. He covered his face with his arm, hiding his shame and grief and bone-deep regret.

He remembered the desire to control, the paranoid delusions, and all the feelings that had propelled his actions. What he didn’t understand was why. What lay hidden within himself that, inveighed with that monstrous power, he had been capable of murder? He couldn’t pretend that he hadn’t actively desired Kirk’s death, because he had. There was no hiding from that.

There had always been a certain amount of envy on his part where his friend was concerned. Things seemed to come easy for Kirk. At the academy, women had flocked to the young cadet Kirk like bees to honey. And the boyish good looks had only matured to a devastating handsomeness that women found irresistible. When the captaincy had been handed Kirk, Mitchell had found old resentments he had thought long buried brought to the surface. The power had given him a way to bring himself up to his friend’s level, at least in his own mind.

The buzz of the door-signal interrupted his thoughts and brought him to the present. He sat up, unlocking the door and rising to meet his captain as Kirk walked into the room.

“Got a minute?” Kirk’s manner was hesitant.

“Sure. What’s on your mind?” Mitchell motioned to the chair placed across the desk and took his own.

Kirk lightly drummed his fingers on the desk, but self-consciously pulling his hand back when he noticed the nervous movement. “I just wanted to see how you were doing. Mark seemed to think that you shouldn’t be alone right now.”

“I’m happy the good doctor’s still concerned. I would have thought he’d recommend me for a padded cell first.”

“We all know what you did wasn’t intentional.”

“Do you?” Mitchell smiled at Kirk’s look of surprise. “Did it ever occur to you that I might have always wanted to do the things I did? That the power only let loose what I already felt like doing?”

Kirk thought a moment. “Gary, we all have dark thoughts of what we would do if we could do whatever we wanted. Most of us never get the chance to find out. You weren’t so lucky.”

“Well, maybe.” Mitchell forced a mock gaiety. “So, what’s the plan now? Do I get to stay with the ship, or are you going to ship me off to the closest hospital so I can be dissected. find out what makes me tick?”

“That’s not funny. Anyway, I’m not sure _what’s_ going to happen. Mark is leaving...guess he’s had enough. Our new CMO’s a good friend of mine, Leonard McCoy. I’m sure you’ve heard me mention him. I’ve known him for years. It’ll be up to him.”

“Yeah, I remember you telling me about him. You think he’ll be able to tell me why I can’t...why I can’t...”

“What?”

Mitchell shook his head in confusion. “It’s hard to explain. Remember how I could always ‘feel’ my way through things? ‘See’ more than what showed on the surface, know when something was about to happen?”

“Yes. Your high psi-rating.”

“It’s gone.” Mitchell’s voice was almost angry. “Will McCoy be able to tell me why? Help me get it back?”

A look of compassion and regret passed over Kirk’s face. “I can already tell you why.”

“You know?”

“Yes. Mr. Spock told me.”

“Spock? What does he have to do with all this? I know he wanted me dead. If this is his way—”

“That’s not true. If he hadn’t figured out how to negate your powers, we _would_ have had to kill you.”

Mitchell shrugged. “I’m sorry. You’re right, of course. It’s strange, I’ve never been able to figure Spock out. Always thought he just didn’t want to be involved with us emotional humans. But I always respected him, and I know that whatever he did, he did for the good of the ship. I guess I owe him one. So, what’d he do to me?”

Kirk rubbed his neck and hesitated a moment. “He tried to explain it to me. The serum he injected you with ‘blew out’ your powers by overloading your brain with what gave you your psi abilities to begin with, a brain chemistry high in certain compounds. The added amount was just too much for it to handle. It destroyed everything. I’m sorry, Gary.”

Mitchell rested his head in his hands, vividly recalling the fight that had almost taken Kirk’s life. Caught up in the victory he thought was his, a boulder in his hands ready to crush the life from his captain, he hadn’t noticed the science officer sneak up behind him and empty the loaded hypo into his neck. “He might as well have killed me. I feel half dead this way, like my brain’s half asleep.”

“Maybe McCoy will be able to help you with that.” Kirk rose and came up to him, resting has hand on the bowed shoulders. “Listen, it’s almost dinner time. Why don’t we go for a bite to eat, maybe spend some time together...just you and me?”

He brought his head up and gazed at Kirk for a moment. He really didn’t feel like leaving his cabin. There were too many out there who hadn’t forgotten...or forgiven. “Jim, I—”

“Come on, Gary. You can’t hide in here forever.”

“I guess your right.” He reluctantly got up, and together they left for the mess. Mitchell still wasn’t sure where he stood with the ship...or his friend. But if Jim was willing to give it a try, maybe everything would be all right. He certainly hoped so.

^^^^^

Mitchell waited for his friend in the rec-room, taking the time to catch up on the latest gossip flying around the ship. At least, he was no longer everyone’s number one punching bag. Stiles now had that particular honor.

Kirk walked in and grabbed a cup of coffee before heading toward the table. He slid in across from Mitchell. “Been here long?”

“Just a few minutes. Been listening in though. The consensus seems to be that my back-up might need a few lessons in tolerance.” He was still on half-shifts, but maybe this would make his captain see how much he needed him on the bridge.

“You mean Stiles?” Kirk shook his head. “I’ll never know how he managed to get past the examiners at the Academy with that attitude. Hopefully, Mr. Spock saving his life will have a lasting affect. I just wish my science officer would open up more. It might have made a difference.”

“Spock’s okay. But I did tell you he’s almost impossible to get to know.”

“I’m finding that out. You should have seen McCoy’s first meeting with him. I’ve got a feeling it’s not going to be dull with those two at each other all the time.”

Mitchell frowned. “McCoy doesn’t like Mr. Spock?”

“No, I wouldn’t say that. Their styles are just different, that’s all. By the way, Bones tells me he’s been running some tests on you.”

“Yeah,” Mitchell replied ruefully. “For all the good it’s doing.”

“What’s wrong, Gary?”

“I don’t know, Jim. I feel okay, it’s just...like I’m seeing things through a fog. That’s not it, either...hell, I can’t explain it.”

“Bones is doing all he can,” Kirk replied softly.

“I know,” Mitchell barely whispered.

The doors opened up and Mr. Spock walked in. He headed directly for the food processors and punched up his selection. He took his tray and headed for a back table.

“Care to join us, Mr. Spock?” Kirk asked, as the Vulcan walked by.

“No thank you, Captain. I have a report to go over at this time.” Spock nodded his head at the two men and continued on.

“Didn’t I tell you?” Mitchell asked, throwing a sympathetic look at Kirk.

“I know, I know. Can’t blame a guy for trying.”

“That’s what I like about you, Jim. Willing to try the impossible.”

^^^^^

Mitchell’s words were very much on Kirk’s mind weeks later as he watched Spock contemplate his next move. The chess set on the table created another barrier between them, a barrier just as impenetrable as the one the Vulcan used to keep everyone out, including his captain.

Kirk sighed. Sometimes, he didn’t know why he even tried. Chess had been about the only thing Spock had been receptive to. It didn’t look like he was going to have any more luck figuring the Vulcan out than Mitchell had.

He saw Mitchell walk into the rec-room and head their way. He was surprised by the slight tenseness that shimmered through Spock’s lean physique when the science officer looked up and saw who had caught his attention.

“What can I do for you, Gary?” Kirk asked, as he moved his bishop up a level.

Mitchell straddled a chair, a sly look directed at Spock. “Just thought I’d see what you two were up to. Not to often you get to see our resident chess champion get spanked.”

Kirk’s eye’s flew to Spock. The Vulcan had stiffened even more, and Kirk thought he was going to cut Gary to pieces...figuratively, if not literally. Instead, Spock seemed uncharacteristically unsure of himself, obviously stifling his initial response.

Finally, Spock relaxed and, lifting an eyebrow, gave Mitchell a look one would normally reserve for some species of fungus. “Being so easily amused must have its benefits. I am at a loss, however, as to what they might be.” He turned to his captain. “If you will excuse me, sir. There is an experiment in the lab that needs my attention. Perhaps, we can continue the game some other time.”

“Sure, Mr. Spock. No problem.” He watched the Vulcan stand and walk away before turning to his navigator. “What was that all about?”

“Beats me. He sure doesn’t know how to take a joke, does he?”

Kirk shook his head in exasperation, “Gary, have you been bothering him?”

“Who, me?” Mitchell chuckled, “Spock’s my pal.”

“Sure he is. That’s why he froze you out right now. I’ve never seen him do anything like that before.”

“So, we have a temperamental Vulcan on our hands. Forget about him. What I want to know is what your plans are once we hit Wrigley’s?”

The shore leave rotation schedule had only been posted a few hours before, and Kirk had wondered if Mitchell would say anything to him. He already had plans with McCoy. “Bones and I are planning to go to a new place we’ve heard about. Suppose to cater to us military types.” At the fleeting look of disappointment on his friend’s face, he added, “Want to come along?”

“You sure McCoy won’t mind?”

“Why would he mind? Besides, it’ll be like old times. Remember that time you and I, and several junior classmen who shall remain nameless, spent the weekend checking out the strip joints in San Francisco?”

Mitchell grinned, and they spent the next hour reminiscing. But after his friend had left for the bridge, Kirk replayed the whole conversation in his mind. He never _had_ seen Spock react that way... to anyone. He knew Gary was having trouble adjusting. They’d almost had some run-ins of their own.

What had Gary said? That Spock didn’t have a sense of humor? In fact, the science officer had proven to have a very compelling sense of humor. You just had to know what to look for. He remembered being both surprised and delighted the one time he had been the recipient of the Vulcan’s dry wit. It hadn’t happened again, much to Kirk’s disappointment.

He ruefully began putting away the chess pieces. It would probably be weeks before he’d be able to entice Spock into another game. Of course, it might have helped if he had called Mitchell on his less than respectful attitude toward a superior officer. Letting his old friend get away with that sort of thing was a habit he needed to break...especially since it seemed Mitchell was taking advantage of it more and more.

After what Kirk euphemistically called ‘the incident,’ his friend had appeared to settle into his new existence, making a peace of sorts with himself. But it had only lasted a few weeks, and recently he had noticed a subtle change in the once carefree and happy-go-lucky young man. He was not quite so carefree anymore, sometimes displaying a certain level of surliness, and lashing out at the slightest provocation. It was putting a strain on the friendship, and, maybe, on the running of the ship.

He finished putting the set away and headed for his quarters. They were on their way to Alfa 177 for a geological survey. If they were lucky, maybe they’d find something that would make this more than the milk-run it would undoubtedly be.

^^^^^

Kirk still thought his attempts to reach out to Mitchell, letting him know that the bonds of their friendship were still strong, and still worth holding on to, were worth the effort. At least, that‘s what he told himself as he waited abed in sickbay. He’d had the whole night to do nothing but think about himself, his friendships, and what it was that made a man who he was.

He hoped McCoy would finally release him. All the tests had shown that he was perfectly all right...at least as far as you could be after being split in two and then merged back together again. He sat up as the doctor came into the private room he had stuck Kirk in. No sense letting the crew think their captain was still having problems.

“Well? Do I get out of here?”

“Good morning to you, too.” McCoy ignored the look of disgust the other man threw him and handed him his uniform. “Yes, you can leave today. But take it easy. Let your first officer handle things for a while.”

“I plan on it. He’s shown I can count on him.”

“Really?” McCoy’s eyebrows rose. “How? By treating what happened to you as a ‘fascinating’ experiment he was lucky enough to witness? I felt like slugging him.”

“He doesn’t mean to be that way, Bones. That’s just Mr. Spock.” Kirk got up and started to change.

“Yeah, right. By the way, Mitchell’s been asking about you.”

I’m sure he has.” Kirk finished dressing and then walked over to the mirror hanging over the sink in the corner, running his hands through his hair to try and get it into a semblance of order.

“What’s the matter? Something going on between you two I should know about?”

Kirk placed his hands on the sink’s edge and wearily shook his head, “Not really. It’s just that his reaction to all this wasn’t what I expected...or hoped for.”

“How’s that? He seemed to be acting okay to me.”

The captain turned and studied McCoy for a moment. “He’s just different, that’s all. The way he acted with my ‘wolf,’ I got the impression that he’d prefer me that way.”

“Don’t be too hard on him, Jim. He’s had a rough time, too. I’m still trying to find something to straighten him out. We’ve had a few successes but, by and large, he’s had to coup with the loss of his abilities alone.”

“Maybe you’re right. But sometimes it’s like I don’t know him anymore. He’ll act one way for a while, then make a one-eighty the next. I never know how he’ll react to anything. You sure there’s nothing going on?”

“Not that I’ve been able to detect. His tests have all come back negative, and the brainwave patterns that showed up before, haven’t returned.” He came up to Kirk and placed his hand on the captain’s shoulder. “Give him time. He’ll be okay in the long run.”

The two men walked out of the room together, and Kirk left sickbay and headed for his cabin, wishing there was someone he could talk to about this. McCoy was too involved, too close to the situation. He needed someone who could step back and be objective...someone like Mr. Spock. He laughed to himself. He could just imagine the Vulcan’s reaction to being pressed into service as a sounding board.

^^^^^

Mitchell sat at the back table of the rec room, his main objective anonymity. Mr. Spock had done a good job of cutting him done to size, and right now all he wanted was to sit by himself and nurse his wounds. The first officer had been on his back ever since they left Psi 2000. Actually, when he thought about it, the Vulcan had kept a close eye on him ever since the problem with the transporter.

Mitchell had been intrigued by the ‘wolf’ Kirk, and had managed to talk to the man for a few minutes. Sneaking into sickbay, he peppered the supine man with questions, trying to find out what Kirk had kept hidden all these years. It turned out, Kirk wasn’t the saint everyone thought him to be. The ‘wolf’ Kirk had almost talked Mitchell into releasing him when McCoy, Spock and the other Kirk had entered the room. Mitchell had made a fast retreat.

Ever since, he felt like he was constantly having to justify his actions, especially those dealing with their most recent mission. Maybe he _should_ have got to the bridge faster than he had, but Ensign Rice had quite effectively sidetracked him. He had been after her for months, and the note she left pinned to his bed had proven too much to ignore. If they hadn’t bumped into Spock, the Vulcan wandering the corridors in a daze, no one would have ever known.

But they had, and now it seemed as if Spock was watching him all the time, just waiting to catch him in another slip-up. And Kirk...the captain had sided with the Vulcan every time. Mitchell didn’t hate the science officer, exactly. But he was making a good start. He rubbed at his neck, caught by his conflicting feelings. He kept trying to remember that it was because of the Vulcan that he himself still lived. It didn’t always help.

At the sound of the rec-room doors sliding open, he looked up from his contemplations in time to see Kirk enter with Dr. McCoy. He ducked his head down, making sure neither man noticed him as they took the table to his left. Ever since the doctor had come on board, he and Kirk had been thick as thieves.

Several months had passed since their run-in with the barrier at the edge of the galaxy, and it seemed to be getting harder and harder to keep his friendship with Kirk from imploding. God only knew he had tried, and if he was honest with himself, so had Kirk. But for some reason, the camaraderie and trust that had always defined their relationship was slipping away.

“I had to hit him, Bones.”

Kirk’s words caught Mitchell’s attention. He propped his elbows on the table and brought his hands up to shield his face, trying to hide himself from the two men. He listened intently to their conversation, stealing glances as best he could.

“What’d he do?” McCoy’s voice was pitched as low as Kirk’s, but Mitchell had no trouble making out what they were saying.

“He hit me back.” Kirk rubbed his jaw. “That seemed to shake him up even more, because he finally started coming out of it. It was so strange, seeing him that way.”

“How’s he been since?”

“Distant...more so than usual. I’ve tried to draw him out, but that little episode seems to have undone all the hard work I put in to get him to loosen up.”

“Well, Jim, I’ve never understood why you even try. Apparently, that’s just the way the man is. Why fight it?”

Kirk shook his head. “I don’t believe it, that’s why. There’s more there than he’s ever let any of us see. There has to be. I just wish I could figure out how to get to it.”

“Why? He’s done just about everything he can to discourage you.”

“I’ve wondered that myself. I can’t explain it. There’s just something about him that, I don’t know, ‘fascinates’ me to coin a phrase. I talked to Chris about him when I first got the ship. He said that Spock was loyal, efficient, and very private. In all their years serving together, they never had a personal conversation, never spent time together outside of duty. It just disturbs me, thinking that he’s all alone the way he is. I know if I could get through to him, we could have a really good relationship.”

“If you say so...you’re not planning on inviting him on shore leave with us, are you?” McCoy asked.

“I’m not crazy. You and Gary would kill me if I even tried.”

“Gary?” McCoy’s voice rose slightly in surprise. “I didn’t know you had invited him.”

“Do you mind? Things haven’t been going too well between us lately. I figured it’s be a good way to—”

“Dr. McCoy, please report to sickbay.” The voice over the intercom interrupted Kirk and the doctor gave him a helpless shrug.

“Better go. We’ve got an ensign down there with a severe allergic reaction.”

“Nothing too bad, I hope.” Kirk looked up as McCoy rose from his seat.

“No, Seems he tried some new aphrodisiac that guaranteed results. Well, he got them all right. Big, bright red ones all over his...privates. I’ve been trying to come up with something to help relieve the swelling. We probably got the latest lab results back.”

Kirk laughed, “You better be on your way, then. See you later, McCoy.”

The room quieted after that, but when Mitchell lifted his head Kirk was looking right at him, a small smile on his face.

“Eavesdropping, Gary?”

“N..no. I didn’t want to interrupt you and the doctor, that’s all.”

“I see.” Kirk got up and walked over to his table. He didn’t sit down, just stood next to it, but his eyes never left Mitchell’s face. “We’re still friends, aren’t we?”

“Sure we are, Jim. Why would you ask that?”

“Just wondering. I haven’t seen much of you lately.”

“You can thank your first officer for that. It was his idea to put me on beta shift.”

“He’s only doing his job, Gary.”

“You always stick up for him, do you know that?”

There was a distant look in Kirk’s eyes when he finally answered. “Only when he’s right.”

The captain was half way to the door before Mitchell found his voice. “Jim?”

Kirk stopped and turned around. “Yeah?”

“I’ll see you tomorrow for shore leave?”

Kirk only nodded and walked away.

^^^^^

Shore leave helped the two men draw closer together, even if sometimes Mitchell felt that he was still somehow losing his friend. He didn’t know where those thoughts came from, only that when they did, he wanted to lash out at the closest person available. More often than not, that person happened to be the first officer.

The Vulcan was up to something, he just knew it. Something to do with the captain. He was always _there_ , making himself indispensable to Kirk, always ready with the answers. But Mitchell had been the one Kirk had turned to when, Kodos dead and his daughter completely insane, the captain had needed someone to be there in silent support. Later, after dropping Lenore and her father’s body off at the nearest starbase, the two men had gone out and got roaring drunk.

Trying to dispel the dark thoughts, Mitchell started whistling softly as he made his way to sickbay. McCoy was nagging him about having another physical, still probing for any signs of instability, any sign that the powers were returning. He could have told him there was nothing to worry about.

He was better, the fog that had settled over his mind after his psi abilities had been destroyed had lifted, but that was about it. And if he had been left in a world suddenly flat and devoid of substance, no one seemed to be of the mind to care. All they worried about was what would happen to _them._ If he _could_ do any of the things he had been able to, a certain science officer would be in deep trouble.

He entered sickbay to find Nurse Chapel its only occupant.

“Where’s Dr. McCoy?” He smiled at the woman. She wasn’t half bad, but the entire crew knew about her ridiculous crush on Mr. Spock. Still, one never knew, and Mitchell wasn’t the type to pass up a chance like this. He came over and settled on the edge of her desk, leaning close.

“He went to the lab for a moment. He told me to tell you to wait in his office.” She nervously gathered up the report she was working on. “I’ll be in the back room if you need anything.” She got up and, with a backward glance, walked through the connecting doorway.

Mitchell laughed and went into McCoy’s office, taking the chair next to the cluttered desk. He propped his feet up on the corner, and leaned back as he scanned the room. He’d been there so many times he had the room memorized, so the large, obviously recent report on the nearby credenza caught his eye immediately.

He got up and sauntered over, casting a quick glance at the closed door. The oversized words _Tantalus Colony_ grabbed his attention, and he opened up the cover and began scanning through the report.

His eyes widened as he read what Kirk had gone through on the planet. The captain’s recent and numerous meetings with McCoy now made sense. Apparently, Kirk was still trying to deal with the aftereffects of the machine he had been subjected to. Amazement turned to anger when he read _how_ McCoy and Mr. Spock had known there was trouble on the colony. He slammed the report closed. As he tried to come to terms with his new life, a life drained of a large part of what had made him who he was, the Vulcan had blithely gone along, _his_ mental powers not affected in the least. Mitchell thought about leaving, afraid of what he’d say to the doctor. How much of the animosity he felt toward the first officer would slip out as he demanded the answers that he felt were his due?

The door slid open and McCoy walked in. In a hurry, he sat down but didn’t look up from the chart in his hand, didn’t notice that Mitchell was barely containing his anger. “Just take a seat, Gary. I’ll be with you in a moment.”

Mitchell sat down, trembling with rage. “Doctor?”

Something in Mitchell’s voice got through to McCoy and he looked up, puzzled. “What’s the matter?”

“Doctor, what exactly is a ‘mind-meld’?”

“How do you know about mind-melds?” McCoy watched him warily.

Mitchell only nodded his head toward the report.

“You had no right going through—”

“I had every right!” He came up out of his chair, and his hands slammed against the desk.

“Sit down, Gary.” McCoy stared at the younger man until, with a look of disgust, Mitchell returned to his seat. The doctor leaned over and hit the intercom. “McCoy to bridge. Jim?”

“What is it, Bones?” Kirk sounded mildly distracted.

“Jim, I’ve got a minor problem down here. Do you think you could spare a few minutes?”

They could hear soft talking in the background. Kirk was keeping his voice low, but Mitchell could distinctly pick out Mr. Spock’s baritone as he and the captain conversed. Finally, Kirk got back to them.

“I’ll be right there. Kirk out.”

The two men sat silently during the ten minutes it took Kirk to get to sickbay. When the captain entered McCoy’s office, he glanced from one man to the other and frowned. “What’s going on?”

“Gary wants to know why we didn’t tell him about Spock’s telepathy.” McCoy leaned back, his arms folded.

Kirk pulled up a third chair, and settled himself next to Mitchell. “How did you find out?”

“Does it matter?”

“I guess not. Gary, you know what a private man Mr. Spock is. _I_ wouldn’t have found out about it if he hadn’t thought it was vital to the welfare of the ship for him to use it.”

“So, you thought his privacy was more important than my right to know?”

“What right? What Spock has or doesn’t have, doesn’t concern you. It’s a strictly personal—”

“To hell it is! That...man took everything from me! Do you have any idea how hard it’s been to adjust to this...this change in me? Even after all this time, I still don’t feel the same. It’s been a nightmare. Hell, at first I didn’t even think I’d ever be able to navigate the ship anymore.”

“What’s that got to do with it?” McCoy interjected.

He rubbed the back of his head, a gesture that was becoming habit, trying to get his thoughts in order. “It’s hard to explain. It made me...more aware of the ship in an odd sort of way.” He brought his hand down, looking from Kirk to McCoy, almost pleading. “Can’t you see what this has done? He should have just let me die. Instead, he’s condemned me to this half existence, while he keeps what he’s got. Why is that? Why?” He waved the doctor off. “Forget it. I really don’t expect an answer.”

“Well, I’ve got one for you. I know you’re aware that the telepathy you had was caused by your brain’s somewhat unique chemical make-up. Mr. Spock’s, on the other hand, is physiological. It’s hardwired into him, part of his brain structure.”

“Gary, it’s not Spock’s fault. He was only trying to save your life,” Kirk said, his voice soft.

“He shouldn’t have bothered.” He looked at the doctor. “Can I go now?”

“Yeah, go ahead. We’ll reschedule for another day.”

Mitchell got up and walked out without a word to either man. As he made his way to his cabin, he pondered the information he had garnered from the report. Mr. Spock was telepathic, but he had to be in physical contact to pick up anything. His skin crawled. No way was he ever going to let the Vulcan touch him again.

^^^^^

The turbolift doors opened, depositing High Commissioner Ferris on the bridge. Kirk looked over, noted the man’s smug expression and turned back to study the viewscreen. Murasaki 312 spiraled before them, blocking out the stars ahead.

“Captain to shuttlecraft Galileo. Stand by Mr. Spock.” He started to rise from his chair when the intercom opened up.

“Sickbay to Captain Kirk.”

“Bones? What are you doing in sickbay? The shuttle’s about to launch.”

“’Fraid not, Jim. I’ve got Spock down here. He collapsed on our way to the shuttle bay. I’m running some tests on him right now. Looks like some kind of poison.”

“Is he going to be okay?” Kirk frowned.

“I’m not sure yet. He’s pretty sick. You’d better get replacements for both of us.”

“Okay. Call me as soon as you know something.”

“Will do. McCoy out.”

Kirk thought a moment before reopening a channel to the shuttle bay, “Kirk to Mr. Scott.”

“Scott here.”

“Something’s come up with Mr. Spock, and McCoy’s got him in sickbay. I’m going to need you to stay with the ship. I’m sending replacements down for the three of you. Go over the mission with them, make sure they know what to look for, then get up here.”

“Aye, Captain. Is Mr. Spock all right?”

“I’m not sure, Scotty. Kirk out.” Kirk ordered the replacements and then looked up at Commodore Ferris. “This won’t take long Commodore. The shuttle will only be out for a few hours.”

“I remind you Captain, I am entirely opposed to this delay. Your mission is to get those emergency medical supplies to Marcus Three in time for their transfer to the New Paris Colony.”

“No problem, Commissioner. And may I remind you that I have standing orders to investigate all quasars and quasar-like phenomena wherever they may be encountered?” Kirk got up and proceeded over to the science station, checking the read-outs Mr. Spock had set up before his departure. “Besides, it’s three days to Marcus, and the rendezvous doesn’t take place for five. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to see what’s going on with my first officer.” Kirk turned and started for the turbolift. “Mr. Mitchell, you have the com.”

On his way to sickbay, he thought about this latest problem with Spock. Recently, nothing had gone right for the first officer. He couldn’t imagine that someone as responsible and intelligent as the man was could misplace so many things, or make the errors that had been showing up in his work. Could he be _that_ wrong about him? Spock had seemed at a loss to account for the problem, but it had been disconcerting to see the Vulcan obviously upset, or at least as upset as Spock ever got. Kirk pushed the problem aside as he made sickbay. He walked over to McCoy, who was sitting at his desk staring at his computer screen.

“What’s going on?” Kirk took the seat across from the doctor.

“He’s been poisoned.” McCoy leaned over and pushed the terminal around, allowing Kirk to see the chart there.

Kirk shook his head and pushed it back. “I can’t make out anything from that. Tell me what you’ve found.”

“I don’t know how, but he’s got traces in his system of the same poison that almost killed Kevin Riley.”

“The one Lenore Karidian used?”

“That’s right. It’s not normally effective on Vulcans, but Mr. Spock’s human half proved to be a problem. I don’t have to tell you how that particular bit of news went over with him.”

“Is he all right?”

McCoy sighed, “He’s out of the woods, but he’s far from all right. That stuff played havoc with his system. I’m keeping him here for at least two weeks.”

“ _Two weeks?_ ”

“Hell, Jim, he almost died. It almost destroyed his liver. That’s not something you get over in a day, even with a Vulcan healing trance. He’s going to have to take it easy for a while.”

“I don’t understand. Riley was out of here within hours.”

“Yeah, but we caught it right away. This stuff has been in Mr. Spock’s system for days. If he had bothered to say something as soon as he started feeling bad...” The doctor shrugged.

“I guess I can have Gary back-up as first. Science is going to be a tough one, though.”

“That’s not your only problem.”

“No?”

“No. Maybe I’m not making myself clear. Spock didn’t just accidentally ingest this stuff. Someone tried to kill him, and came pretty close to succeeding.”

Kirk rubbed his chin as he pondered McCoy’s accusation. “That _is_ a problem. Who on board would have the opportunity, and desire, to do that?”

“I don’t know, Jim. But you’d better find out. I wouldn’t imagine that whoever it is is going to just give up.”

I don’t get it. Why would anyone want to kill him? What motive would they have?”

“You’re kidding. He isn’t exactly Mr. Popularity, you know. He’s pissed off more than a few people. Not exactly the friendly type, if you know what I mean.”

“Just because he keeps to himself is no reason to kill a man, Bones. Can I see him now?”

“Yeah, just keep it short. He needs to rest. I put him in the back room. It’s more private, and I could raise the temperature to make it more comfortable for him.”

Kirk got up and headed to the room. The temperature was well over ship’s norm, and a light sweat broke out on his forehead as the door closed behind him. His first officer was asleep, the signs of illness and exhaustion etched on his face. Kirk walked over and stood beside the bed. More than ever, he wished he and this man had been able to connect more than they had. As it was, he didn’t have a clue as to what could have transpired to make anyone hate the Vulcan enough to want him dead. And Spock probably wouldn’t tell him, even if he knew. He started to leave but was drawn back when Spock moved, his eyes slowly opening.

“Captain?” The Vulcan tried to sit up, but apparently decided against it after only a halfhearted attempt.

“How are you doing?” Kirk asked, studying his first officer.

“I am functional.” Spock looked away, but not before Kirk saw in the Vulcan’s eyes a vulnerability he had never thought to see there.

“McCoy says you’re going to be in here a while.”

“Yes,” Spock nodded, clearly uncomfortable.

“Spock, someone tried to kill you.”

“I assumed as much.”

“Do you have any idea who it could have been?”

Spock shook his head. “No, Captain, I do not.”

“I don’t get it. Why would anyone want to kill _you_? You haven’t done anything to warrant it.”

“Sometimes...sometimes what I am is enough provocation for some.”

“Because you’re Vulcan? I can’t believe that.”

Spock looked at him, as if he wanted to say something more. But in the end, he just looked away.

I’m trying to help you, Mr. Spock. If you have any suspicions, I need to know about them.”

“No, Captain. No suspicions.” Spock kept his head turned away, his words barely audible.

Kirk sighed, “Okay, I’m letting it go for now. Get some rest. But don’t think I’m letting this drop, Mister. You’re hiding something. I’ll be damned if I’m going to let someone kill you just to preserve your precious privacy.”

He walked out and headed back to the bridge. Would he ever understand this man?

^^^^^

The bar was only half full when they entered. Kirk motioned to a vacant table at the back and, with McCoy and Mitchell in tow, wended his way over. He took the chair against the wall, scanning the room as his friends sat down. The waitress came over and graced Kirk with a smile.

“What can I get you, gentlemen?” Her words were for all three men, but her eyes remained locked on Kirk, her appreciation obvious.

McCoy noticed the unspoken exchange between his captain and the young woman and shook his head. “I’ll have a bourbon, straight up.”

“Whiskey.” Kirk smiled, turning the full force of his charm on her.

“Uh, the same.” Mitchell laughed as the waitress walked off. “Careful, Jim. That one’s known to be trouble.”

Kirk turned to his friend in surprise. “Trouble? How so?”

“She’s looking for a meal ticket. Your face wasn’t the only thing she noticed.” He tapped a finger against the captain’s stripes on Kirk’s arm.

Kirk shrugged. “I can handle it. Besides, the night is young. Plenty of time to decide how I want to spend it.” He noticed a lot of military personal in the bar. Figured. Starbase eleven was a favorite stopover for space-weary crewmen looking for a good time...or a way to forget about the companions they had lost. He mentally shook himself. Now was not the time to think about the seven crew members lost on Taurus II.

He glanced over at McCoy, and noticed the doctor appraising him. He gave a weak smile. This whole thing had been set up to help him get over, or at least put behind him, the tragic incident. When, with Scotty expertise, they had finally been able to pierce the sensor interference and locate the small ship, he had ordered a rescue party down to the planet. The Galileo was in pieces, parts strewn across a wide expanse. The crew had made a valiant effort to keep the natives of the planet out, but with little success. Seven bodies were finally found and brought back to the ship. Even now they lay in deep-freeze, waiting their eventual return to the planets of their birth.

Kirk lapsed into silence until their drinks were brought. But the smile he gave the girl had lost some of its previous wattage. He turned to the doctor. “I’m glad you were able to make it, Bones. I thought you had decided to stay on the ship.”

“I was going to, but Mr. Spock’s getting better. I added a mild tranquilizer to his medication, keep him from trying to leave sickbay. I swear, that man’s almost as bad as you are when it comes to staying put. Kept going on about needing to finish his work.”

“Well, I can’t fault the man for that. He _is_ the best at what he does.”

“Yeah, well, those two gorillas you have stationed outside his room don’t help much, either.”

“Someone tried to kill him, Bones. I needed to do something. Until we find whoever it is—”

“Gentlemen, may I remind you that we’re on shore leave?” Mitchell looked from one man to the other. “As ‘fascinating’ as you both seem to find our first officer, I, for one, would much rather talk about something else.”

“Okay. How about the three women you promised would be meeting us here tonight?” Kirk took a sip of his drink, his glance drifting around the room.

“They’ll be here, don’t worry. Have I ever let you down before?”

“Who are these women, anyway?” McCoy asked.

“Tina’s an old friend from the academy. One of the few girls with enough sense to prefer me to Jim. I’ve never met the other two. I think they work with her.”

“I don’t understand. Isn’t she in the military?”

“He left that part out,” Kirk quipped.

“She didn’t finish. Seems they found out she was making money on the side, spreading her charms,” Mitchell replied sheepishly.

“Oh, great. Professionals. That really wasn’t what I had in mind,” McCoy groused.

“No, no, they’re not. She was only doing it to pay for tuition. After she left the academy, she got a job with some transport company. Been in that line of work ever since. Right now, she’s working for some outfit...Eternal Travels, or something like that.”

McCoy almost choked on his drink. “Eternal Travels? Don’t you know what that is?”

“Never heard of it.”

“What is it, Bones?” Kirk asked.

McCoy chuckled, “It’s a funeral service. They load up your body and, for a substantial fee, shoot it into orbit around the planet of your choice...an uninhabited one, of course.”

“You’re kidding?” Mitchell looked stunned.

“I kid you not,” McCoy turned to Kirk. “I hope this doesn’t say anything about what the other two are like.”

“I wouldn’t think so.” Kirk looked at Mitchell. “Do you know what the other two look like?”

“Actually, I do. One’s a great looking brunette, and the other is a stacked blonde...and they just walked in the door.”

All three men rose as the women approached, Mitchell taking the tall, willowy, brunette in an intimate embrace. He gave her a thorough kiss before turning to his friends. “Jim, Leonard, meet Tina Lewis.”

The woman put out her hand, and firmly shook both men’s with a confident grip. “Gentlemen, this is Kelly D’Angelo.” She motioned to the other brunette who only smiled and stepped aside, letting the buxom blonde come forward. “And Michelle Stuart.”

The blonde woman stepped closer, her eyes on McCoy. “Tina says you’re a friend of Gary’s.”

“That’s right.” The doctor grinned and pulled out the seat next to his, “Your chair, my lady.”

With a laugh, the woman sat down. Tina took a seat and pulled her chair close to Mitchell, while the quiet brunette, after a hesitant look, sat next to Kirk.

“You’re their captain?” She gazed at Kirk.

“Yes,” Kirk smiled at her, liking her quiet charm right off. “But my name is Jim.”

“Jim. Nice name. Have you known Gary long?”

“Almost fifteen years. Since the academy.”

Kelly looked at Mitchell and her friend, both lost in a deep conversation. “Yes, Tina mentioned that’s where she met him.”

“Is that a problem?” Kirk watched the play of emotions across her face.

“No, no problem. I guess I just figured you would be more like them.”

“Them? You mean Gary and Tina?”

“Yes. You know, boisterous, the life of the party type.”

Kirk took her hand. “No, we’re not all like that. Some of us like quiet times, good conversation.”

She smiled at him then, a smile that promised both, and more.

^^^^^

Kirk strolled through the corridors of the ship, heading for the transporter room. It was nice to be back on board, but he kept thinking about the shore leave the week before. Kelly had been great. After a night of conversation and dancing, they had gone to her apartment. The sex had been fabulous. Slow, and just hard enough. For the next three days, they had divided their time between on-the-town with their four friends, and quiet interludes alone together. He hoped she was still unattached the next time he made the planet.

The shore leave had had the added plus of seeming to completely restore his and Gary’s friendship to its previous level. It had been like old times. They had double-dated a lot as cadets, and those last few days had brought back the closeness they had lost.

The picnic the six of them had gone on the second day of their leave had been the catalyst for a long talk between the two friends. While McCoy had enthralled the three women with stories of life aboard a starship, Kirk and Mitchell had taken a walk, trying to sort through the complex web of hurt feelings and betrayed trust that had come between them. It hadn’t been easy.

The path they chose meandered through the dense brush that grew wild in the now-dry stream bed, creating a cocoon of quiet and solitude. After twenty minutes or so, they had sat down in the deep grass and fought to find a way to restore what had been lost.

“Do you remember Rene Wells?” Mitchell’s question had broken the silence that had suddenly come between them.

“Long, dark hair, blue eyes?” Kirk leaned back, resting on one elbow.

“That’s the one. I had a real thing for her, did you know that?”

“No, I didn’t. What happened?”

Mitchell was quiet for a moment, picking at a blade of grass and absentmindedly chewing on its stem. “She wouldn’t give me the time of day. The only one she was interested in was a certain intense cadet with his nose constantly buried in a book.”

“Me? I didn’t know that.” Kirk pondered the information for a few moments. “I wonder why she never said anything. I don’t remember her ever even talking to me.”

“No, she wouldn’t have. She was one of the quiet ones. She would have waited for you to make the first move. And of course, you never did. This was right before you met Ruth.” Mitchell chuckled, “I guess it took an older woman to get you out of your shell. Anyway, I think that was the first time I lost out to you. It sure hasn’t been the last.”

“Does it bother you, Gary?”

“It hadn’t, not for a long time. But this thing,” Mitchell made a motion to his brow, “it’s dredged up a lot of old issues I thought dead and buried a long time ago. You’re my friend, Jim. That hasn’t changed. What’s changed is how I see things, people. Maybe that’s why I’ve been having trouble with Mr. Spock.”

“What’s he got to do with us, our friendship?”

“I’m not sure. But I think he still sees me as a danger.”

Kirk sat up, a red-alert sounding at the back of his mind. “Are there problems between you?”

“No. He doesn’t do anything that could be construed as a threat. It’s just a feeling I have. You’ve gotten closer to him, haven’t you?”

Kirk was taken aback by the question. “No, not really. He’s a hard man to get to know.”

“Then how come you’ve been spending so much more time with him?”

“He’s my first officer. I _need_ to know him.” He puzzled over it for a moment. “And there’s something about him that...calls to me. That’s not right, but I can’t find the words to really explain it. I guess he intrigues me. I won’t deny I’ve tried to become friends with him, so far with little success.”

Mitchell seemed satisfied with that answer, sitting up and smiling. “That mean I don’t have to worry about him taking you away from me?”

“Taking me away from you? What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“I’m just kidding, Jim.” Mitchell stood up and extended his hand to help his captain up. “Come on. Let’s walk some more.”

And they had. By the time they returned to the rest of the group, Kirk felt that the air had been cleared between them. It was a good feeling to have things back to normal.

He reached the transporter room, looking forward to the reception Commodore Travers would undoubtedly have waiting for them on Cestus III.

^^^^^

Kirk turned over on his side, trying to get comfortable on the narrow bed. McCoy had insisted on him staying in sickbay for the night, arguing that you never knew what the side-effects the kind of transporting Kirk went through might have. God, he felt like this was becoming his permanent quarters, he was landing in sickbay so often. But the array of bruises on his body had been the clincher. The Gorn had almost crushed several ribs, and his ankle would need a few more treatments before it was back to normal.

The very dim light allowed him to see only a vague outline of his first officer, still ensconced in sickbay. McCoy had hinted at releasing both of them in the morning. He hoped so. The last days had shown just how much he had come to rely on Spock’s expertise. He wished he could somehow make contact with the man. The news the Vulcan had received earlier in the day couldn’t have been easy to take alone.

When Kirk saw Spock’s hand come up and lightly rub his forehead, he made his decision. He got up and quietly walked across the room until he was at the side of his first officer’s bed.

“Mr. Spock?”

Spock slowly brought his hand down, eyeing his captain warily. “Yes, Captain?”

Kirk shifted on his feet, beginning to doubt his hasty decision. “I thought you might feel like talking. You seem to be having the same problem sleeping as I am.”

“Vulcans do not require the amount of sleep humans do. I have tried to make Dr. McCoy cognizant of this fact, but he has seen fit to ignore me.”

“He’s only looking out for what’s best for you.” Kirk watched the Vulcan for a moment. “I thought you might want to talk about Chris Pike.”

Spock stiffened, his stare locked on the ceiling above. “There is nothing to say.”

“You served with him for a very long time. His death—”

“Vulcans do not react to death the way humans do.”

“Don’t they? I thought he was a friend of yours.”

“As you say, we...served together. I respected his professionalism and adherence to duty.”

Kirk knew there was so much more going on here than Spock was willing to admit. Sorrow radiated off the Vulcan. Was he the only one who could see it? “Spock...I know it’s hard to lose someone you’ve known a long time, even if all you felt was respect. Even Vulcans honor their dead.”

“Yes...even Vulcans.” He hesitated a moment. ”There was much to honor in Captain Pike.”

“I wonder what he was like...as a person, I mean. I imagine we all wonder about people after they’re gone, if perhaps we should have tried to know them better, spend more time with them.”

Spock finally turned and looked at Kirk. “Why are you here, Captain?”

Kirk gave a small smile. “I’m not really sure. I wanted to say how sorry I was to hear of the death of your fr...of your former captain. But I guess that’s only part of it. You see, Mr. Spock, for some unknown reason I feel a connection to you. I can’t explain it. You’ve done just about everything you could to discourage any kind of relationship between us, other than a professional one. Yet I still can’t help but feel there could be something really good between us, if you’d let it.”

“Why? Why would you desire such between us?”

“Why not? Is it so hard for you to accept that someone might want to get to know you? Might find you interesting, and worth cultivating as a friend?”

“That thought had not occurred to me.” Spock’s gaze strayed back to the ceiling. “Captain Pike was not my friend. There was mutual respect, and the loyalty that a Vulcan must give to those he serves, but never the intimacy of friendship. I believe it is something he might have desired, but I was unable to respond. What you ask of me, it is difficult for one such as I.”

“I know that, but I don’t expect miracles. Just think about it, okay?”

“Yes, Sir. I will do that.”

“That’s all I ask. Now get some sleep, Mr. Spock.” He returned to his bed, knowing that he’d be able to sleep now. Something had started tonight, of that he was sure. Only time would tell if it would grow into more. He hoped so.

^^^^^

True to his word, McCoy released both men the following morning, with the proviso that they both “take it easy.” Easier said than done. It was several weeks before there was a break in the constant emergencies that seemed to follow the ship. When asked by Ambassador Fox to remain with him on Eminiar VII for a few days to aid in his efforts to bring peace to the system, Kirk jumped at the chance. He was pleasantly surprised when Spock agreed to join him.

The room they were given overlooked a large park, a city-locked island of green. Kirk stood at the balcony, enjoying the view while Spock completed his preparations for dinner. A banquet was being prepared in honor of Ambassador Fox and his successful negotiations of a peace treaty. When the Vulcan came to stand beside him, Kirk turned and smiled. Gone was the regulation blue of Starfleet. Ordered to present themselves at their best, Spock was dressed in a black tunic and pants, the austere color complimented by the dark-purple piping set in an intricate design on the shoulders and lapels of the tunic.

“You look great, Mr. Spock. Is that the way they dress on Vulcan?”

Spock nodded. “For formal occasion, yes, Captain.” His eyebrows went up in questions. “And you?”

Kirk shrugged. “Might as well go with the program.” The pale gold tunic he wore was offset by the tan pants that hugged his body. He hadn’t worn the outfit in a while, the need for such formal dress rarely needed on a starship, and handily covered by his dress uniform anyway.

They left for the banquet, arriving with several minutes to spare. Their assigned seats were at the table immediately to the right of the Ambassador’s. Taking their places, Kirk began to scan the room. “I hope this doesn’t last too long. Sitting for such a long time really doesn’t suit me. I’d never have made it as a diplomat.”

Spock cocked his head, ”I would think you would make an excellent diplomat. Your ability to see things as they really are, to ‘cut to the chase’ of the matter, would be invaluable in the arena of negotiations.”

“Thanks, but I’ll stick with being captain of a starship.”

“To which you are extremely well suited.” Spock hesitated a moment. “I must admit to have had certain...misgivings when it was announced that you would be the next captain of the _Enterprise._ ”

“Really?” Kirk was intrigued. “Why’s that?”

“As I have previously stated, my relationship with Captain Pike was a formal one. But I was not his first officer. And I knew that the very nature of _our_ association would demand more.”

“But that would have been the case with whoever got the ship.”

“Perhaps. But I was cognizant of your...unorthodox mode of operation, having read your complete file—”

“You read the whole thing?” Kirk was amazed. He’d seen his file. Starfleet bureaucracy being what it was, the thing was massive.

“Of course. I desired to know all I could about you.”

“And you thought we wouldn’t work well together.” It was not a question.

“I believed there would be a certain...difficulty in reaching a satisfactory work environment.”

“And was there?”

Spock almost smiled, or so it seemed to Kirk. “No, there was not. You were everything I could have wished for in a commanding officer.”

Something passed between them then, an unspoken promise of trust and reliance, something that didn’t lessen as the night wore on and the days passed. And when, three days later, they were picked up by the _Enterprise,_ Kirk felt he had finally found the friend he had always known was there waiting for him.

^^^^^

Mitchell kept his attention fastened on the board in front of him, his hands at the ready. The explosion at the helmsman’s station, and Sulu’s temporary incapacitation, had almost distracted him from his job. The _Enterprise_ glided over and around the ripples of time displacement as Mitchell’s fingers flew over the controls. He felt alive, the ship an extension of his own body, and he finally turned to throw a fast wink at the still shaken helmsman.

No one was better at this than he was. No one. He had brought the ship through, unscathed. Just as he had when they had almost collided with that antique of a ship floating in space while the captain and first officer had been off pretending to be diplomats. He was up for a commendation for that one. Too bad the occupants hadn’t made it. The eighty of so life readings had stilled before Mr. Scott finally decided to board her.

As he brought the ship safely through the last of the disturbances, he relaxed back in his chair, turning to face his senior officers. _How’s that, Mr. Science Officer?_

“Captain, the last of the readings from the planet below have been forwarded to Starfleet. Will we be going down to investigate?” Spock was standing next to the captain, that odd look on his face that Mitchell had been noticing more and more whenever the Vulcan and Kirk were together, ever since they had spent days together on Eminiar VII.

Kirk looked up at his first officer. “No, I don’t think so. Starfleet’s already got another problem for us. Seems that Commissioner Hedford has developed Sakuro’s disease. McCoy’s got the antidote on board. If we leave right now, we can get there in time.”

“I do not believe that Commissioner Hedford would appreciate being designated a ‘problem’.”

“No? Well, Mr. Spock, that’s exactly what she tends to be. From everything I’ve heard, the woman is...difficult.”

“If you say so, sir. I presume you will be accompanying the good doctor?”

“It’ll only be for a few hours. Once McCoy is sure she’ll recover, we’ll beam back up to the ship. And ‘we’ will be accompanying him. If I’ve got to have the pleasure of her company, so do you.”

“Indeed?” Spock’s eyebrow rose, the tone of his voice misinterpreted by the fuming navigator. Who the hell did that Vulcan think he was, talking to the captain in that manner?

Kirk laughed in delighted surprise, “Yes, indeed.” He looked over, catching Mitchell off guard. “Mr. Mitchell, set a course for Epsilon Canaris Three, warp six.”

“Yes, sir.” The smile he sent his captain’s way was not returned. Was not, in fact, even noticed. Mitchell swiveled forward and plotted the new course, his attention still on the conversation behind him.

“Up for a game tonight? We won’t make the rendezvous until morning, but after that it might be a while before we have the time again.” Kirk’s voice was low, sharing an intimacy with the Vulcan that had always been reserved for _him_. Mitchell’s fists clenched at the first officer’s response.

“Is nineteen hundred hours convenient? There is an experiment in progress that I wish to observe.”

“That’ll be fine. I’ll even have supper brought up, because I know you won’t have ate.”

The rest was lost on Mitchell, and when the two men left the bridge, Kirk’s leaving Sulu in charge didn’t even register. His slow burn had flared to a roaring blaze, his growing distrust of the Vulcan taking on a new dimension.

^^^^^

Kirk’s fingers drummed impatiently, his other hand holding open the book propped on the desk. He glanced at the chronometer, his eyes narrowing. It wasn’t like Spock to be late. Closing the book, he reached over to the intercom.

“Kirk to science lab. Mr. Spock, please respond.” The seconds passed. When no reply was forthcoming after his second request, Kirk knew something was wrong. He switched channels and ordered security to the science labs before hurrying there himself.

The lab doors opened and he rushed in. Mr. Spock was being helped off the floor by two security men, blood slowly oozing from the crown of his head. He was lowered to a chair where he sat staring vacantly.

“What happened?” Kirk frowned when the Vulcan didn’t respond. “Get McCoy down here,” He ordered, before going down on one knee.

Spock’s head was lowered to his chest, and his breathing was labored. Kirk gently lifted the Vulcan’s chin, his worry deepening when he saw the pain etched on Spock’s face, the obvious fight to retain consciousness. “Hold on, Spock.”

Spock hesitantly nodded his head, “I do not...I—”

“Don’t try to talk right now. McCoy will be here any second.” Kirk looked anxiously around, until his gaze was caught by the bloodied stick one of the security men was carefully wrapping. “What is that?”

“It’s from engineering, sir. It’s used to manually tighten down the air hatches in the event of power loss.” The man turned it, bringing the hooked end into Kirk’s view. Blood and hair matted its end.

Kirk swore. This was the second time an attempt had been made on Spock’s life. “Get your chief down here.” Looking back at his science officer, he feared that this time it might still be successful. Spock’s eyes were open, but dulled over, and shivers were beginning to course through the lean body. “Where the hell is McCoy?”

Just then the doors opened, and McCoy entered followed by two medics pushing a gurney.

“Out of the way, Jim.” McCoy instantly took charge, his instructions quick and concise. In no time, they had the Vulcan strapped onto the gurney, while the doctor set up a sterile field around the bleeding cranium.

“Is he going to be all right?” Kirk leaned over, trying to see what was going on as McCoy pumped hypo after hypo into Spock.

“I’m not sure, yet.” McCoy scanned his tricorder and frowned, “I’ve got to get him to sickbay. I’ll let you know.” With a nod, he motioned the two techs forward.

Grimly, Kirk watched his science officer wheeled out and then turned to Giotto. The security chief had showed up and was now in command of the investigation. “Find anything else?”

“No, sir. Whoever did this covered his tracks pretty well.”

“I ordered two men posted to Mr. Spock. What happened?”

“Sir, Mr. Spock countermanded your order. He said it wasn’t necessary any longer, that the danger was over. I assumed that you were aware—”

“Damn that man!” Kirk fumed. He wasn’t sure who he was more mad at. Spock, for putting himself in danger, or himself for not anticipating it. “From now on, I want two men with him at all times. Is that understood? And they are not to be dismissed until I say so.” He sighed in exasperation. “Find out what you can and let me know. I’ll be in sickbay.”

Sickbay was quiet when Kirk entered. He walked to the back room where McCoy would be working on the Vulcan. Sure enough, the door was closed and the light above the door shone red. No admittance. He waited several minutes but then figuring it would probably be more like hours, Kirk decided to return to his cabin. McCoy would let him know as soon as there was anything to report. An unexpected flash of pain went through him as he thought about Spock, about the possibility of the Vulcan not making it. He could lose the man he had just begun to think of as a friend.

^^^^^

“Kirk here.” He was instantly awake, the sound of the intercom bringing him off the bed and to the desk.

“It’s McCoy, Jim. I wanted to let you know, Spock made it through okay. I just now got out of surgery. It was touch and go there for a while, but I think he’ll be all right.”

“You think?” Kirk couldn’t keep the impatience out of his voice.

“Something like this is never for sure, Jim. I’m reasonable sure he’ll make a full recovery, but I won’t whitewash it. He’s got a lot of healing to do.”

“Can I see him?”

“He’s not conscious, but if you insist, go ahead. I’ll be here for a while yet.”

“I’m on my way. Kirk out.” He threw on a clean uniform and headed for sickbay. When he got there, McCoy was in his office, his feet propped up on the desk, his eyes closed.

“Bones?” Kirk slid into the chair across from McCoy.

“God, I’m tired.” McCoy pulled his legs down and sat up. “There was only minimal brain damage. He’ll have some killer headaches off and on for a while, so his concentration won’t be what it was. That’ll pass though. The one thing I _am_ worried about is his telepathy.”

“Explain.”

“It’s the area where the damage was done. Mainly his ability to meld with someone. That, plus he won’t be able to use a healing trance on himself. But everything I’ve read makes me think it’ll only be temporary. It’s how he’ll deal with it that bothers me.”

“Why? If he knows it’s only a temporary problem...”

McCoy waved his hand in exasperation. “You know Spock. He’ll see it as a sign that he’s not Vulcan enough. Put him on the same level as us lowly humans.”

Kirk frowned. “I think you’re wrong about him, Bones.”

“Maybe. If I am, great. Anyway, other than that, all he has to do is rest. And I mean _rest._ I don’t want to see him on duty for at least two weeks. I don’t care if you have to tie him down, I don’t want to see him on the bridge or in the science labs. You hear?”

“I got you, Bones.” Kirk rose. “Can I see him now?”

“Don’t stay too long. He’s pretty much out of it.” McCoy got up and stretched. “As for me, I’m to bed. Chapel will call me if anything comes up.”

Kirk walked to the back and let himself into the small room. The lights had been lowered and the heat raised to a setting only a Vulcan could love. He gazed at his first officer, wondering who could hate the man so much to do such a thing. It bothered him, a lot. And that bothered him, too. He barely knew Spock. Their friendship was so new. He had been delighted at the way Spock was opening up to him, the camaraderie that was blossoming between them. But he had this...attraction to Spock he couldn’t explain. Okay, the man was an intellectual giant, loyal to a fault, brave, and the best first officer in the fleet. Yet beneath all that, Kirk knew, lived a passionate soul waiting to be let free.

“Is that what it is, my friend?” Kirk whispered, “Do I have the audacity to think that I can even charm a Vulcan?”

There was no answer.

^^^^^

Mitchell hunched over his station, nursing a headache. He’d noticed them recently, appearing suddenly, and then disappearing just as fast.

“Bridge, navigation.” Kirk’s voice came over the intercom.

“Bridge, navigation.” Mitchell answered his captain’s call. Kirk had left with Mr. Spock in tow, obviously angry, two hours before. Maybe the Vulcan was finally getting what he deserved.

“Mr. Mitchell, lay in a course for Vulcan. Tell engineering I want warp eight or better. Push her for all she’ll take.”

“Jim, you’ve got to be kidding?!” Mitchell responded, angrily.

“Mister Mitchell, I gave you an order. I expect you to carry it out.” Kirk’s tone was cold, but Mitchell knew from past experience that it could explode into a blistering heat.

“Yes, sir.” He cut off the intercom and laid in the course back to Vulcan, jabbing at the controls. When he had reported to Kirk the change in course ordered by Spock, this wasn’t the outcome he’d had in mind.

“I wonder what’s going on,” Sulu spoke up beside him.

“Beats me. Whatever it is, the captain’s going to be up to his neck in hot water. We’re _supposed_ to get to Altair asap.”

“Maybe it has to do with Mr. Spock’s injury,” The helmsman mused. “He hasn’t looked too well ever since that knock on the head he took a few weeks ago.”

“Yeah, maybe. Must be nice to have the entire ship at your beck and call,” Mitchell groused.

“I don’t know. It would have to be really serious for Mr. Spock to even ask. He just isn’t that way.”

“How would you know? That Vulcan doesn’t hardly speak to any of us away from duty.”

Sulu shrugged, “He’s always been fair with me. And while you, McCoy, and the captain were on Capella Four, he was calling up here from his cabin, helping Mr. Scott as much as he could. That was right after he had been attacked and he was still in a lot of pain. Anyone who would do that, put other’s welfare in front of his own, well, that person’s all right with me.”

Mitchell didn’t answer. He remembered being stuck on that primitive planet, running from the natives with that pregnant bitch on their hands. He didn’t want to hear that their making it out in one piece might have anything to do with the Vulcan.

^^^^^

In sickbay, McCoy pulled out a bottle of brandy as Kirk settled into his chair. The doctor poured them both a generous amount and then joined his captain at his desk.

“Thanks.” Kirk took a sip, and nodded his appreciation.

McCoy just shook his head. “I don’t know, Jim. I think this is a big mistake.”

“What? Saving Spock’s life? You said it yourself. If we don’t get him to Vulcan, he’s going to die. I can’t let that happen.”

“I know, but at what cost? You could lose the ship, hell, your career, for someone who probably wouldn’t lift a finger if it was you.”

“I don’t believe that. I know you don’t like the man, but we’re talking about his life.”

“Are we? Or are we talking about your irrational fixation with him?”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Kirk abruptly sat forward.

“I’m talking about you constantly going out of your way to, I don’t know, make contact with him. He doesn’t want your friendship, Jim. Why do you keep banging your head against a brick wall?”

Kirk leaned back, rubbing his forehead. “I’m not. He was responding to me, Bones, before he was attacked. Since then...”

“He’s crawled back into his shell, hasn’t he?”

“Yeah. But this time, he has a good reason.”

“Because someone tried to kill him? Why shut you out for something someone else did?”

Kirk shrugged. Spock had been acting strangely the last few weeks, but it didn’t have anything to do with the attack. But he couldn’t tell McCoy what Spock had finally admitted to him. How do Vulcan’s chose their mate? He could still hear Spock’s whispered confession. He had dragged it out of him, pushing with everything he had, until the Vulcan told him what he needed to know. But what happened now? How would Spock react when he returned from his home world?

He took another sip of the potent liquor. “How is he, really?”

“You mean from the attack? I thought okay. His headaches were lessening, and he was slowly gaining back his strength. The only thing was that his ability to meld hadn’t been coming back as fast as I would have hoped. That really seemed to concern him. But I wonder, did his head injury have anything to do with what’s happening to him now?”

“What do you mean? How could one thing have anything to do with the other?”

“It’d be quite a coincidence if it didn’t, don’t you think?”

It was a thought, but Kirk doubted it. It was all just bad timing as far as he could see. “I don’t know, Bones. I just want the whole thing over with. Once we drop him off, we’ll head for Altair Six. I just hope I’m still in command of the ship when he’s ready to come back.”

^^^^^

Kirk sat in his darkened cabin, his elbows propped on his desk, a stargram clenched in one fist, a drink in the other. He lay the shot glass against his forehead, and tried to wrap his mind around the news he’d just received. Death had followed him, but once again had taking those around him, missing him completely. He put the glass down and poured out another shot, the liquor splashing over the side of the glass.

He placed the note on the spilt liquid, and watched as it soaked into the paper, blurring the words. He closed his eyes. You were supposed to be safe at home, the dangers of space travel unable to touch you there. How could things have gone so wrong?

He lifted his head at the sound of someone buzzing for entrance.

“Come.”

The door opened and Spock walked up to the desk. It was the first time he had seen him alone since the Vulcan had rejoined the ship three days before.

“What can I do for you, Mr. Spock?”

Spock looked down and swallowed nervously. “Dr. McCoy has informed me of the passing of your brother and his family. I grieve with thee.” The last words were said in the style of a ritual.

Kirk stared at him for a moment. “Oh. Thank you, Mr. Spock. Was that all?”

The Vulcan pressed his lips together, obviously at a loss at how to proceed. “And to...thank you for allowing me to take my leave on my home planet.”

“I thought thanks were illogical. Never mind.” He waved his hand. “Take a seat, Mr. Spock. Stay a while.”

Spock sat in the chair in front of the desk, nervously glancing at the bottle of whiskey. “You have been drinking.”

“You’re damn right I have. What’s the matter, Mr. Spock? Am I being too human for you?” Kirk slugged down the drink and started to pour another. He looked at the Vulcan in surprise when Spock gently lay his hand on Kirk’s arm.

“Please, do not do this.”

“Why not? Because you don’t approve?”

“No, because I am...your friend, and I wish to help.” Spock pulled his hand away, and tightly clenched it with its partner in his lap, “It is difficult for me to know how to respond to emotional situations. But you have proved to be worth making the effort for. You have done things for me that no other has ever thought to do. I do not wish to lose what has grown between us. If I have acted improperly since my return, I deeply regret it.”

Kirk slowly put the bottle down and shoved the glass to the side. “Thank you. You don’t know how glad I am to hear you say that, how much I needed to hear you say it.” He tilted his head and studied the Vulcan. “And you? How are you doing?”

“I am well. The imbalance in my system has been dealt with. There should not be a reoccurrence.”

“I’m glad. I was afraid you weren’t coming back. When I received the message from Vulcan, from T’Pau of all people, I figured that you had decided to stay there.” Kirk laughed softly, “Instead, I got my career back. Was that your doing?”

“Perhaps indirectly. T’Pau is my father’s mother. When she learned that you would be punished for your part in saving my life, she took steps to insure that would not happen.”

Kirk leaned back, the pain of his loss receding slightly within the glow of his new friendship. “Family is a funny thing, isn’t it?”

Spock looked at him, perplexed. “I do not understand.”

“You can go years without seeing any of them, but the connection stays with you your entire life. I hadn’t seem Sam, my brother, for a couple of years. We were really close as boys, but as the years passed we started to drift apart. Before you got here, I was wondering how his death could affect me so much when his life hadn’t anymore?”

“As you say, there is a permanent connection. I too, am not close to my family. It had been several years since my last visit to Vulcan.”

Kirk’s eyes darkened. “It was supposed to be us, Spock. Our orders had been to go to Deneva when we were diverted to Epsilon Canaris Three because Commissioner Hedford insisted that her illness be made top priority. What would it be like? To be responsible for the deaths of two million people? They say Matt Decker has gone over the edge because of it. But what if it had been me who had to give the order?”

“You do not know what you would have done in his place. Things could have worked out much differently. It is illogical to worry about what might have been.”

“You’re right, I know you’re right.” He got up and walked over to sit on the edge of the desk, and placed his hand on Spock’s shoulder. “I’m really glad your back. The ship wouldn’t have been the same without you.”

Spock gazed directly at the human, seeming to look deep into Kirk’s soul. “My life is here now, as is yours. Perhaps it is time to build on these new ties, to replace the ones we have lost.”

Kirk nodded his head. “Yes, perhaps it is.”

^^^^^

Mitchell tightened the pack on the security man’s back, then turned to have his own secured. As he did, the doors to the transporter room flew open. He grimaced as he watched the captain and Mr. Spock walk in, their attention focused on each other. Kirk was grinning, somehow finding amusement in something the Vulcan said.

“Everything set, Scotty?” Kirk asked as he shrugged into his own pack, his science officer already helping to adjust it.

“The transponder signals are keyed in. There should na be any problem on this end. If ye run into trouble, just turn on the beacon and we’ll home in on it.” The Scot stood behind the console, his hands resting on the controls.

“What’s with the beacon?” Mitchell asked.

“Gamma Seginus II is noted for the interference caused by its upper atmosphere on standard transmitting equipment. Our communicators will be useless. Unless contacted, the _Enterprise_ will not beam us back on board for four days. At that time they will use the coordinates received from the transponders,” The science officer responded.

“Great. How come just the four of us?”

“That is all that is deemed necessary.” Spock’s brief response annoyed Mitchell almost as much as the Vulcan’s almost protective stance next to the captain.

“Well, what if we run into something we can’t handle?” Mitchell rubbed at his arm, the transponder implanted by McCoy inching slightly.

“There is almost no life on the planet. Why that is, is what the original expedition was attempting to ascertain. Since there is no indigenous life forms other than the vegetation, there should be nothing there that we cannot ‘handle.’”

“We’ll be okay,” Kirk interjected. “Come on. It’s time to go.”

The four men took their places on the transporter platform. Taking along their own shelter and food, the men would investigate the disappearance of the outpost members sent six months before. The last contact had been three weeks earlier.

Beamed down to the planet surface, the men quickly set up camp. Night was already falling, and the temperature was dropping rapidly.

Mitchell walked over to where Kirk was setting up the beacon. The captain was down on one knee, trying to secure the apparatus to a nearby boulder.

“Think Saunders will mind bunking with the Vulcan?”

Kirk stood up, brushing the dirt from his hands. “Saunders will do as he’s told. But don’t worry, Gary. I’m bunking with Spock.”

“For Pete’s sake, Jim. You don’t have to baby-sit him every time he comes along.”

Kirk looked at him strangely. “I think you need to get one thing straight, Gary. I’m not going to allow any problem you have with Spock to interfere with how I run my ship. I will assign crew as I see fit, whether they like the arrangements or not. If you have a problem with that...”

Mitchell was angry now, and it overrode the common sense that should have told him that his captain was through handling him with kid gloves. “I know it’s your ship. But it seems like you’re always giving preference to that green-blooded son-of-”

“That’s enough, Mr. Mitchell. I don’t ever want to hear you speak disparagingly of Mr. Spock, again. If I do, you’ll find yourself on report so fast you’re head will spin. I won’t stand for insubordination. Against me, or my first officer. Am I making myself perfectly clear?”

“Sure. Sure, Captain Kirk, whatever you say,” Mitchell tone was belligerent, but he closed his mouth on whatever else he felt like saying.

Kirk walked off without another word. _Straight to the Vulcan_ , Mitchell noticed. He had been right, all along. That half-human freak had first tried to destroy him, and when that didn’t work, was trying to take his best friend away. That, he wouldn’t stand for. He had to find a way to make Kirk see the Vulcan for what he really was, a conniving manipulator, out to catch the captain in his web of lies and deceit.

By the time he got to the tent he was to share with Saunders, Mitchell’s anger had cooled to a steady blaze. He barely noticed the cold as he finished setting up his gear. Saunders was already inside, and had set the small heater to its highest setting. Mitchell threw off his clothes, and crawled into his sleeping bag.

The night was unnaturally quiet since there was no life to break the silence. Mitchell could here the soft snoring of the man across the tent, dead to the world almost as soon as his head hit the pillow. But Mitchell couldn’t sleep. He was still too keyed up over his fight with Kirk to do more than toss and turn. So when sounds filtered over from the other tent, he propped himself up on his elbows and strained to hear more. Their light was still on, and Mitchell could make out the forms of the two men, sitting across from each other.

They were talking, but the words were indistinct. What wasn’t, was the tone of Kirk’s voice. He sounded almost carefree, as if the weight of command had been lifted from him for a time. Every so often, he would laugh, and every laugh cut into Mitchell like a dull knife. Spock was winning. He was seducing Kirk to his side, changing the man into a puppet to be used for his own purposes. Eventually, the sounds stopped and the light went out.

^^^^^

Kirk woke early, not sure if the cause was the hard surface beneath him that his sleeping bag did little to ease, or his normal impatience to get started, but the sun was barely beginning to light up the campsite when he opened his eyes. He lay quietly. He and Spock had talked for some time the night before, and he didn’t want to disturb the Vulcan’s sleep.

Kirk positioned himself on his side, propping himself up on one elbow to bring his friend into view. Spock was flat on his back, but his head was turned towards Kirk. It gave the human a feeling of satisfaction to know that this oh-so-private man had finally opened himself to him. What would have been a sobering mission, had become a shared adventure.

He still didn’t quite understand his attraction to the Vulcan. He had met one or two men over the years who had tempted him into considering a homosexual relationship. But for whatever reason, he had never gone through with it. For the first time, he knew that given the opportunity, he would.

He gazed at his sleeping friend, _Friend, yes, you are finally my friend_ , and wondered if Spock would ever consider such a thing. He knew next to nothing about Vulcan sexual mores, and even less about Spock’s. If he had any expectations of anything ever happening, he knew he’d have to go slow, let Spock set the pace of the relationship.

His only concern was the woman he had seen for only a few moments as her image was transmitted to the ship. T’Pring. Was she Spock’s wife? He had said so that day, but on his return had never mentioned her again. But Kirk had pulled up Spock’s records just days ago. The Vulcan was still listed as single, his parents his beneficiaries. But how did he find out for sure? He sighed and laid back down.

He must have been making more noise than he thought, because at that moment Spock sat up, pulling his sleeping bag up around his shoulders, “Captain? Is something amiss?”

“’Jim’, Spock. You promised to call me ‘Jim’ when we were alone, or off duty, remember?”

The Vulcan ducked his head, and looked hesitantly up at his captain. “Very well...Jim.”

“That’s better, and no, nothing’s wrong. I was just contemplating getting up and going out into that cold.” Kirk pulled the sleeping bag more tightly around him.

“It is still thirty-five minutes until dawn. If you wish to sleep, I will wake you then.”

“That’s okay. I’m not sleepy anymore. I guess we should get up and get things started.”

The two men swiftly dressed, and then went outside to start preparations for the day. Kirk smiled in pleasure when he noticed how in tune they seemed to be. _As if we can read each other’s minds._ He shook his head and laughed ruefully.

Spock turned to him, an eyebrow on the rise.

“Nothing, Spock. Just a stray thought.” Kirk turned toward the other tent. “But I think it’s time the rest of this party joined us.”

Kirk walked over and woke the two men. He noticed that Mitchell looked like he hadn’t slept well, and it occurred to him that he was beginning to not trust his friend. Why else would the first thing to come to mind be to wonder what the man had been up to that he hadn’t slept? His friend’s behavior was starting to bother him.

But was it really that simple? Or did it have more to do with the fact that Mitchell didn’t like Spock anymore? He had when Kirk first took command, Kirk could have sworn to that. When had it changed? And why? As far back as he could remember, Mitchell had always been manipulative to a certain degree, with a propensity for being somewhat callous. It had never bothered him before. But now it was aimed at the man Kirk wanted as his lover. Finally, with a mental shake, he pushed the whole thing to the back of his mind. He had other things to worry about right now, mainly, what had happened to the scientists sent here six months ago?

^^^^^

“Find something, Mr. Spock?” Kirk walked over to his science officer who was down on one knee, carefully pulling free the scrap of cloth caught within a small bush. The plant seemed to give at the slightest pressure, making it difficult to extricate the material.

Finally getting it free, Spock turned his tricorder on and began taking readings. “Silk, Captain. Probably from a coat lining. There are traces of cotton stitching along one side.” He rose and handed the scrap of material to Kirk.

“So. Pieces of different parts of the expedition’s supplies and clothing...but no people.” He looked around at the barren landscape. He and Spock had covered a lot of ground surrounding what was the expedition’s last known camp site. As the day had progressed, the hope that they would find any of the expedition members still alive, slowly died.

“There does seem to be some type of biological readings a hundred meters in that direction.” Spock pointed to the left.

The two men followed the readings, finally entering a path cut into the hills that surrounded the area. The narrow valley was studded with a series caves of various sizes and depths. They were about to investigate one of the deeper ones when they spied a dark stain smeared along the wall of the canyon. The Vulcan ran his tricorder across it, only to bring the instrument down after one pass. “Blood. Human blood, and of recent application.”

“One of the scientists?” Kirk studied the rock face.

“Highly probable. Though whatever did this, would have to have immense strength. There are tiny particles of skin and bone imbedded in the rock.”

Kirk blanched and turned away. “Come on. Let’s hook back up with Mitchell and Saunders. See if they’ve seen anything else.”

They found the other two men trying to pry loose a piece of metal that jutted out from the ground. When they finally managed to free it, it turned out to be part of a portable heater. They carried it back to camp, along with several other items they had found. Altogether, it painted a dismal picture.

“Now what?” Mitchell sat on a boulder next to the small stove while Kirk poured himself a cup of coffee.

“We try again tomorrow.” Kirk walked over to one of the small folding chairs and sat down. “There’s got to be something more. Even if the blood _is_ from one of the scientists, where are all the others? Spock?” He turned to the Vulcan, who was sitting on the ground examining what they had found.

“Unknown. But then, we also do not know what happened to the original inhabitants of this planet. Earlier readings show signs of an advanced civilization...and a disruption of the planet’s natural rotation.”

“Are you saying there’s a connection?”

“No, I do not have enough evidence to put forth a hypothesis. I merely stated a fact.”

“Well, gentlemen. We’ve got three more days to try and figure out what happened. I suggest we put it to good use. In the morning, we split up again. Mitchell, you and Saunders head toward the mountain range south of the camp site. The readings indicated a small valley in that direction. Spock, you and I will check out those caves we found.”

The Vulcan nodded, and returned to his work, while Mitchell helped Saunders pack up the supplies to be stored in the tents at night.

Kirk sipped his coffee, replaying everything they had learned that day. He was pretty sure the six men were dead. Even if they had survived whatever destroyed their campsite, without food or water they wouldn’t have lasted more than a few days. There was nothing to eat on this godforsaken planet, the only life a few various forms of vegetation, none edible. And Spock had already identified one of the pieces of twisted metal as part of a water purifier.

His gaze slid to his science officer, who was completely engrossed in his work. _If anyone could figure out what happened here, it’s Spock._ He realizing how much he had come to trust and depend on his friend. They were a good team. Was it any wonder that he now wanted more?

^^^^^

They both woke with a start, the flapping tent loudly signaling its distress.

“What the hell’s going on?” Kirk hurriedly dressed, pulling his jacket on and exiting only seconds behind Spock.

The storm had blown in without warning, and the sky to the north looked like something out of a nightmare. Boiling clouds, tinged gray with the soil of the planet, moved toward them at a frightening pace.

“Captain, I believe it would be prudent to seek shelter elsewhere. The tents were not designed to withstand winds of such velocity.” Spock was having to shout as the howling grew louder.

“Get as much gear as you can gather. We’ll head for the caves we saw this morning.” Kirk motioned south, toward the expedition’s former site. Mitchell and Saunders had scurried out of their tent, and the four men began to quickly gather their supplies.

“Why don’t you signal the ship?” Mitchell yelled as he hurried along, gathering what he could.

“There’s no time. The ship isn’t within transporter range right now. Come on, we better get going.” Kirk shouted. It was getting harder to fight the winds, and they were beginning to be pelted by small rocks carried along by the storm.

They ran for the caves, but were slowed by the burden of their equipment. Packed correctly, it wouldn’t have been a problem. But the bundles that each man carried were bulky, the added weight making it difficult to maneuver. And the storm was intensifying.

Kirk could barely make out the man in front of him. He reached out and grabbed an arm. “Everyone link up.” The winds were threatening to divide them as they made their way forward. Less than half way there, Kirk felt a shock of pain in his right leg, and fell to his knees with a cry. A piece of metal, at least a foot long, stuck out of his thigh, embedded deeply into his flesh.

Mitchell reached out and grabbed the intrusion, but let go at Kirk’s moan of pain. “Jim, it has to come out.”

Kirk stumbled to his feet, “Not here,” He panted, the pain making speech difficult. “Wait until we get to the cave.”

They started forward, slowed even more by the captain’s injury. They could barely see each other, their hold on each other’s arms the only proof that each was not alone in a world of wind and dust.

Kirk didn’t know if he was going to make it. He could feel blood trickle freely down his leg, and each step was a jolt of agony. Spock grabbed him, holding him up, and he wouldn’t have been at all surprised if his friend could feel him shaking. It seemed they would never get there, and his world narrowed down to the fire in his leg, and the reality of the Vulcan leading them onward.

He didn’t remember most of the journey. The next thing he knew, he was lying on the ground, Spock kneeling beside him. It was quiet.

“Where are we?” Kirk gasped, any movement bringing excruciating pain.

“In the cave, approximately thirty meters from the entrance,” Spock gently tore at the material of Kirk’s pants, stopping whenever Kirk tensed.

Mitchell stood to the side, his face closed. “We barely made it...most of us, anyway.”

“What’s he talking about?” Kirk hung on to Spock’s shoulder as the Vulcan continued to clear the wound area. His fingers dug into the first officer’s warm flesh and he moaned in pain when Spock took hold of the metal intrusion.

“We lost Saunders,” Spock answered, and then placed his other hand on Kirk’s chest. “It must come out, Jim.”

Kirk kept hold of the Vulcan, and with the other hand, grabbed onto the blanket on which they had placed him. “Go ahead.”

With a quick tug, Spock pulled the shaft from Kirk’s leg. Agony ripped through him, and the scream that escaped his lips reverberated through the cave as he arched up off the floor. He fell back, unconscious.

^^^^^

Mitchell looked on as the Vulcan finished dressing the wound. Spock had used strips made from Kirk’s pant leg to bind it. They had lost the medical kit and most of the food with Saunders.

“Will he be okay?” Mitchell didn’t like the idea of the captain’s well-being being solely in the hands of the Vulcan, but he had little choice in the matter. His own first-aid skills were sadly lacking, and he didn’t think Spock would let him near, anyway. He was hovering over Kirk, touching him more than Mitchell thought he needed to.

“As long as the wound does not become infected. He does not seem to have lost as much blood as I had originally feared. But he must be kept warm.” Spock pulled the sleeping bag over the unconscious man and tucked it snugly around him. He got up and started going through their provisions. Finding one of the phasers, he used it to heat up a few of the large boulders on the floor of the cave.

“I guess we know what happened to the original expedition now.” Mitchell turned and began sorting out the equipment. The water purifier was still in working order, and they had enough food to last the three days before the lack of a signal would cause their automatic beam-up to the ship. Blankets were plentiful, but that was about it.

“Indeed. They were probably caught off guard, as we were. They must have been aware of the caves, but were unable to make them in time.” Spock placed his sleeping bag next to Kirk and sat down. “I will take first watch. One of us will have to remain awake at all times until we know the captain will be all right.”

Mitchell nodded and, setting up his own bedding, curled up under the blankets. He stared, disturbed at the way the Vulcan was watching over Kirk. There was something not right about it. This was more than one friend caring for the other. It was like the Vulcan thought he owned Kirk, the look proprietary. When Spock’s hand came up to slowly caress Kirk’s head, running his finger’s through the captain’s hair, Mitchell felt like getting up and hitting him. Spock was trying to steal his friend, turn Kirk away from him. The Vulcan would find out that there was no way Mitchell was going to allow that.

He closed his eyes completely, and gave himself up to sleep.

^^^^^

Kirk moaned and reluctantly opened his eyes. “Spock?” He whispered, the dark head above him blurred.

“No, it’s Gary.” Mitchell sat cross-legged next to him, cradling a cup of broth in his hands.

“Is that for me?” Kirk smiled weakly and tried to sit up. He groaned and sank back down as his leg throbbed in protest.

“Let me help you.” Mitchell put down the bowl and help Kirk to a sitting position.

“Where’s Spock?” Kirk asked as he tried to get comfortable. He took the bowl Mitchell offered him, and after a hesitant smell, took a small sip. “You make this?”

“Uh uh. Spock did before he took off to try to find some more of our supplies.”

“He shouldn’t have done that. That storm came out of nowhere. It could just as easily happen again.”

“That’s his problem,” Mitchell sneered.

Kirk stared hard at his friend. “I don’t ever want to hear you talk like that again. I don’t know what your problem with Spock is, and at this point, I really don’t care. But I’m warning you, Gary. You’d better put an end to it...fast.”

“Sure, Jim. Whatever you say.” The smile Mitchell gave him should have set off alarms, but the pain in his leg was becoming an agony he couldn’t ignore.

Kirk put the bowl down after only a couple of more swallows. It wasn’t sitting right, making him nauseous and his leg throbbed painfully, the bandages cutting into him. “Can you loosen this?” He tried moving his leg, but stopped with a gasp of pain.

“Don’t move. It’s going to hurt enough as it is.” Mitchell pulled out his pocket knife and began cutting at the wrapping.

“Hurry,” Kirk whispered through gritted teeth. Sweat popped out on his brow and he tensed with each tug of the knife. Finally, the bandages pulled free, releasing a gush of blood and a slightly fetid smell.

Mitchell grimaced and pulled back. “I think it’s infected.”

“Yeah, I think you’re right,” Kirk examined his wound. It gaped at least two inches across, and the telltale red lines of infection radiated from its edges. He leaned back, his lips compressing together. It hurt like hell. He wished Spock would hurry back. He’d feel better, just knowing the Vulcan was near, even if there wasn’t anything he could do.

He must have dosed, because the next time he opened his eyes, Spock sat at his side, trying to carefully examine the wound. “Am I going to live?” Kirk weakly joked.

Spock frowned. “Do not say such things, even in jest.”

“Sorry. So what do you think?”

“Jim...it is going to have to be sterilized. The infection is spreading, and the _Enterprise_ will not beam us back for at least forty-eight hours.”

“How are you going to do that?” Kirk watched the Vulcan’s face, a sinking feeling growing in the pit of his stomach.

“A heated knife could be used, but it will be extremely painful.”

“I really don’t have any other choice, do I?” Kirk asked, dreading the coming ordeal.

“In fact, you do,” Spock answered, hesitantly. The Vulcan looked down, and then into his eyes. There was fear in the dark orbs, as if Spock expected to be struck, or rejected somehow.

“What? What are you talking about?” He looked at Spock, and then up at Mitchell, who had moved closer at the Vulcan’s pronouncement.

Spock swallowed. “Do you remember the procedure I used to obtain the information from Dr. Van Gelder?”

Kirk nodded, “The mind meld. But how...”

“I could initiate a light meld. In that way, I could channel your pain away. You would feel nothing.”

Mitchell came forward, pushing Spock back as he planted himself between Kirk and the Vulcan. “You’re crazy if you think I’m going to let you take over his mind!”

“Gary, stop it!” Kirk tried to move him out of the way, but the man was too close, and he didn’t have the leverage. “Mr. Mitchell, I’m ordering you...” He put ever ounce of authority he had in his voice. It worked.

The other human faltered, looking from Kirk to the Vulcan still sprawled on his back. “Don’t even think it, Mister,” Mitchell hissed before moving away.

“Spock. Spock, come here.” Kirk reached out and grabbed the Vulcan’s arm, helping him back into a sitting position. “Now, tell me what this means, our melding. What would happen?”

Spock sat up and looked intently at Kirk. Seeming to come to a decision, he responded, “Our minds would join, but only on the surface. I could not read your thoughts, or you mine, though we would be able to ‘feel’ what the other felt. It would last only long enough for me to treat your injury.”

“I thought you couldn’t meld, because of the blow to your head.”

“It has healed sufficiently for me to attempt this. I assure you, Captain, it is perfectly safe for both of us.”

Kirk stared back at his friend, and then nodded. “Do it.”

Mitchell started forward. “Jim, you can’t—”

Stay out of this, Gary.” He turned back to Spock. “Do it, Spock.”

“Very well.” The Vulcan turned and sliding down, lay next to Kirk, propping himself up on one elbow. He brought his other hand up and gently spread it across the human’s face.

Kirk stilled as tendrils of thought flowed into his mind. It felt wonderful, like they were floating. He and Spock, alone together in an infinite forever. Somewhere he could hear the Vulcan speaking, _my mind to yours_ echoing in the mental world created by the two of them. They were one, but not. As if through a mist, he saw Spock remove his hand and turn to work on his leg.

Spock heated the knife, and then begin to cut into the gaping wound. Kirk tensed in pain that never reached him, the Vulcan’s strong mind acting as a shield. So he relaxed into the sensations bombarding him, trying to sort through the feelings he was picking up from his friend. There was trust and affection, built over the long months of their blossoming friendship. And there was something more, something Kirk knew Spock was trying to keep from him.

But if he was picking up all this from Spock, what was Spock picking up from him? At that moment, he didn’t care. The future would take care of itself.

All too soon, he felt the Vulcan’s mind slipping from his, _Don’t leave, Spock, stay forever. Don’t take this away from me._ He tried to hold on, but he didn’t know how. Didn’t know how to keep Spock forever with him...but he would learn.

Kirk opened his eyes. The Vulcan lay next to him, asleep. Spock’s face was pale, and showed the strain of his efforts. Kirk looked down at his leg. The wound had been re-bandaged, the strips of cloth clean and blood-free. The leg ached slightly, but he knew it would be all right now.

A rustling noise drew his attention across the expanse. Mitchell sat on the far side of the cave, his gazed locked on the Vulcan. One hand rested on the back of his neck, slowly massaging into his hair.

“Gary?” Kirk’s call snapped Mitchell out of his fixation.

“Yeah, Jim?” He turned to Kirk, a strange, yet oddly familiar look in his eyes.

“Nothing. I’m going to sleep now. You should, too. We all need the rest.”

Mitchell nodded and closed his eyes, but remained sitting, his back resting against the cave wall.

Kirk studied his friend for a moment. With a sigh, he turned and grabbed the blanket pushed to one side and covered himself and Spock with it. With one last look at the Vulcan, he snuggled down into the bedding. Within minutes, he was asleep.

^^^^^

Kirk woke with a start, instantly awake. The spot next to him was empty. He sat up, taken by a momentary lightheadedness before finally pulling himself to his feet. He hesitantly put weight on his injured leg, but found that most of the pain was gone. He slowly limped over to the mouth of the cave and found Spock sitting on a large boulder just within the entrance.

“What’s going on?” He motioned the Vulcan over and sat next to him.

“Mr. Mitchell has apparently decided to inspect our surroundings. He was gone when I awoke. I did not wish to leave you alone, however.” He turned and looked at Kirk, “How do you feel?”

“The leg’s much better. Thanks.” Kirk gazed at the Vulcan, taken by the beauty of the man. Spock was looking at him in a way he never had before, and there was an air of expectancy between them. He could feel himself start to respond, his cock begin to fill. He looked away, clearing his throat. “Do you know how long he’s been gone?”

“It could not have been long. I woke less than forty minutes before, and he was still here. Do you think I should attempt to ascertain his whereabouts?”

Kirk frowned, then shook his head, “No, give him another twenty minutes. If he doesn’t show up by then...damn, I didn’t want anyone wandering around out there. There’s no telling when another storm could blow in.”

“Indeed. We were most fortunate to be aware of the caves. If we had not been, none of us would have survived.”

“If last night was any indication, it’s no wonder there’s barely any life on this planet. You figure that’s what killed the original inhabitants?”

“I would say so, though we will probably never know for sure. Whether by some cosmic occurrence, or something they brought on themselves, the planet’s rotational shift has caused the weather patterns to which we were subjected. There is no telling what else could occur.”

Kirk didn’t even want to think about that. All he could think about was being close to his friend, what they had shared. He hesitated, unsure of what it was he really wanted to know. “Spock, about the meld...”

“Yes, Captain?” Spock sounded calm, almost lighthearted, as he gazed into Kirk’s eyes.

He felt like he could drown in those eyes. He could feel himself drawing nearer, leaning toward the man at his side. In the silence no words were needed, and he was bringing his hand up to caress Spock’s cheek when the Vulcan stiffened and pulled away. “Mr. Mitchell has returned.”

Kirk turned to see Mitchell walking toward them. He was looking down, his shoulder’s slightly slumped.

“Where did you go?” Kirk tried to control his anger, not sure what had bothered him more. Mitchell’s little trip without authorization, or his ill-timed return.

“I thought I’d try and find Saunders. Remember him?” Mitchell sneered.

“Though I would wish otherwise, there is little chance that he could have survived the storm unprotected,” Spock said.

“That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try.” The navigator was belligerent as he stepped toward the Vulcan.

Kirk stood, placing himself between the two men. “That’s enough, Mr. Mitchell. I think your time would be better spent setting up the water purifier. We’re going to need it.”

Mitchell glared at Spock, but finally backed down and without a word reentered the cave.

“Mr. Mitchell does not care for my company, “Spock said, his tone slightly ironic.

Kirk shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t care what Mr. Mitchell likes or doesn’t like.” He turned and placed his hand on the Vulcan’s shoulder. “I like your company just fine.”

^^^^^

The next two days passed without event. But it was with heartfelt relief that Kirk heard the sound of the transporter as they were taken back up to the ship. They materialized in the transporter room, three dirty, tired men...and one almost unrecognizable transponder.

“What happened?” McCoy came up to the platform, his medical tricorder already out and running.

“Some kind of freak storm. It came up on us fast. We barely had time to make it to a nearby cave. Saunders must have fallen behind.” Kirk wearily stepped down, wincing as he tried to put weight on his injured leg.

“I better take a look at that,” McCoy took Kirk’s arm and helped him down. “In fact, I want all three of you in sickbay. You all look like something the cat dragged in.”

Kirk weakly laughed and allowed the doctor to lead him out of the room. Once in the corridor he started to stumble, and Spock was suddenly there, holding his other arm.

McCoy gave a surprised look, but said nothing.

Once in sickbay, the doctor settled them all on the beds. When it was obvious to him that there was nothing wrong with Spock or Mitchell, he released them. Mitchell wasted no time leaving, but Spock had not made the door before he was stopped short.

“Not so fast, Mister.” Kirk came up on his elbows.

“Is something amiss, Captain?” Spock walked over to Kirk’s bedside, an innocent look on his face.

“You wait for the security guards to get here.” Kirk leaned over and briskly called for two to report to sickbay.

“Captain...”

“No, Spock.” He stared down his first officer, until Spock sighed in defeat. “I’m not going to let anything happen to you, so just get used to it.”

The Vulcan looked at him for a moment and then gave what Kirk could have sworn was a small smile. “Very well, Captain. May I wait for my ‘guards’ in the Doctor’s office? I wish to download the information from my tricorder as soon as possible.”

“That’ll be fine.”

Spock nodded and started for the door, but turned at Kirk’s call. “Yes, sir?”

“Chess? Tonight at eighteen hundred?”

“That would be most welcome, Captain.” The Vulcan lifted an eyebrow at Kirk’s obvious pleasure, and departed.

Kirk nodded and lay back down, a smile playing on his lips.

“What was all that about?” McCoy walked up, following Spock’s progress from the room.

“What? The guards? You know about—”

“I’m not talking about the guards. I’m talking about the look that passed between you two.”

“What ‘look’?”

“You know what look. The one that goes with the smile plastered all over you face.” McCoy eyed him suspiciously. “Did something happen down there I should know about?”

Kirk sat up, turning to prop the pillow up behind him. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Bones. What could have happened?”

“You tell me. Mitchell couldn’t get out of here fast enough, and you and Spock were looking at each other like...”

“Like what?” Kirk asked, warily.

“I don’t know.” McCoy groped for words. “I’ve never seen you look at anyone like that before.”

“You’re imagining things, Doctor.”

“Maybe, but not as far as Mitchell is concerned. Jim, the man was obviously upset. Did you two argue?”

“Not exactly.” Kirk rubbed the back of his neck, gathering his thoughts. “Gary’s got a problem with Spock.”

“Because of the mental thing?”

“I’m not sure. But whatever it is, I’m going to have to deal with it right away. I can’t have my senior officers at odds with each other.”

“Jim, do you think Gary might have anything to do with what’s been happening to Spock?”

“I don’t think so. I’ve known Gary a long time. I can’t believe he’s capable of murder. And you said he’s back to normal...”

“Now, I didn’t say that, exactly.”

“But he’s not under any influence, right?” Kirk asked.

“As far as I can tell, he’s not.”

“Then no. Gary’s no murderer. Though I have to admit, it crossed my mind on the planet. He was so adamant about Spock not touching me—”

“Spock touching you? Why would Spock be touching you?” McCoy asked, unable to hide his surprise.

Kirk squirmed slightly. “He used the mind meld on me.” He lifted his hand to stave off McCoy’s outrage. ”And before you get all hot and bothered, it was perfectly all right. Hell, it was more than all right. He used it to block the pain while he worked on my leg. It was amazing, Bones. I didn’t feel a thing.”

“Nothing, huh? remarkable how he managed to use the meld when you needed it.” McCoy’s disbelief was plain, “And what did _he_ feel?”

“I...I don’t know.” Kirk pondered the question. What _had_ Spock felt? Had he taken all of Kirk’s pain into himself? It hadn’t occurred to him that Spock might have felt something other than what he had. The meld had been the most beautiful experience Kirk had ever had. He was surprised at how disappointed he felt thinking that it hadn’t been the same for his friend.

He managed to dispel any suspicions McCoy might have and three hours later was on his way to his quarters. The doctor had made his release conditional on his staying off duty until the next day. His leg was almost healed, McCoy having worked his magic, and a hot shower and a good book waited for him in his cabin. And then chess with Spock. He smiled and shook his head. He had it bad.

^^^^^

Mitchell watched as Spock entered the bridge and took the center seat. Something had obviously gone very wrong. Less than an hour ago the first officer had left, on his way to the transporter room to meet the captain and the rest of the landing party. Scuttlebutt told of a crazed captain hauled off to the brig, McCoy, Scott and Uhura incarcerated along with him.

The Vulcan was upset, continually shifting his weight as if uncomfortable where he sat. Mitchell, still at the science station where he had been ordered for the duration, quietly called up the latest report. Huddled over the viewer, he read with dawning alarm the situation that Kirk was facing. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that if this “mirror” Kirk was here, than their Kirk had been sent to wherever this man called home. No wonder Spock was upset.

As quickly as possible, Mitchell set the sensor controls to automatic and headed off the bridge. The first officer didn’t even look his way. Entering the turbo, he ordered it to the brig.

Two guards stood in front of the doorway, the force field at its highest setting. Mitchell strolled over, feigning a nonchalance he didn’t feel.

“How’s it going, Brenner?”

The security man gave him a stern look. “You shouldn’t be here, Gary. Mr. Spock gave standing orders that no one was to see the prisoners.”

“Really? What’s so important about these particular prisoners?”

“That’s not for me to say. I’m just following orders.”

“That’s interesting.” Gary rubbed his chin, eying the two men. “Tell you what I’m going to do. You and Stanley here give me fifteen minutes with them, and I’ll forget about the money you both owe me.”

The two guards looked at each other, and Mitchell could almost hear the gears turning. Each of them owed him a lot of money.

“I don’t know. If Mr. Spock ever found out...”

“He’s not going to find out. Besides, whatever he doesn’t know won’t hurt him. Come on, fifteen minutes. It’s not like it’s going to hurt anything. What do you say?”

Brenner turned to his partner, “Stanley?”

Stanley shrugged, and Mitchell knew he had won.

“Okay, but fifteen minutes, not a second more.” Brenner cocked his head, motioning to his friend and the two men walked twenty or so feet down the corridor, out of hearing range but still able to see if anything happened.

Mitchell neared the brig entrance, keeping about a foot away. “Kirk, Jim Kirk.” He called to the prisoner, an exact duplicate of his captain.

Maybe not exact. The man who turned around and walked toward him was definitely not the man Mitchell knew. Anyone who knew Jim Kirk would have been able to tell the difference right away. There was a slyness around the eyes, a controlled violence that radiated from the prisoner. The hazel eyes, so much like his friend’s, held a barely concealed astonishment. “Gary Mitchell. You’re the last person I expected to see.”

“And why’s that?”

Kirk laughed, “Because you’re dead, that’s why not.”

“Am I? How did I die?”

Kirk gave him a smoldering smile. “You tried to take what wasn’t yours anymore. Spock didn’t like that.”

“Spock? Mr. Spock?” Mitchell found himself edging forward. “What did I try to take from him?”

Kirk’s smile broadened. “Me.”

Mitchell reared back, taken completely by surprise. “You? What the hell are you talking about?”

The man behind the force field laughed. “You mean Spock and your captain aren’t lovers?” He shook his head. “That’s too bad. Your Kirk is in for a big surprise, a _very_ big surprise.”

“You son of a bitch, you’re lying.”

“Now, why would I lie about something like that? Especially since I’ve got nothing to gain from it? I take it that means you’ve never been with your captain?”

“Of course not. I’m not that way, and neither is Jim Kirk.”

“You sure about that? Well, maybe _you’re_ not...Gary was in it mostly for the power, anyway. But if your captain is anything like me, and there’s no reason to think he’s not...”

“He’s nothing like you.”

“You think so?” Suddenly all the charm the man had been oozing fled. “You better hope he’s like me,” He snarled. “Because when Spock gets hold of him, he’s going to need to be. He’s going to need everything he’s got to keep him at arm’s length. You think Spock would pass up a chance like that? Think again.”

“You mean he’d...”

“Why not? I know I would if your Mr. Spock gave me half the chance. It’s not like cheating...exactly.” His smile returned. “I’d be interesting, that’s for sure. Hell, he’s probably the only other person my Spock _would_ let me be with.”

MItchell backed away. He didn’t want to hear anymore. The man was lying, he had to be. He turned and hurried down the corridor, Kirk’s laughter ringing in his ears.

Three hours later, he watched his two commanding officers as they conversed. The bridge was fairly quiet as they cruised on to their next assignment, but the two men kept their voices low. Mitchell tried to make out any difference in the way they were with each other. He couldn’t. They both seemed at ease with each other, the familiarity, the _intimacy_ that Mitchell had recently noticed between them, still there.

He turned back to his station, and stared at the viewscreen. Intimacy. Was that the right word for it?

^^^^^

“Captain, wait up!”

Kirk turned to see Mitchell running up behind him. It was the first time since Gamma Seginus II they had talked while off-duty. “What is it, Mr. Mitchell?”

Mitchell skidded to a halt, a sheepish look on his face. “I know I deserve that, but I’d like to apologize for my behavior during our time on that planet. I don’t know what got into me.”

Kirk studied his friend, unsure how to take this about-face in his behavior. “It’s not me you should be apologizing to, it’s Spock.”

“Yeah, I know, and I plan on doing just that, just as soon as he’s released from sickbay. How’s he doing, anyway?”

Sickbay. Kirk grimaced, thinking about Spock. McCoy had him there, making sure the phaser stun had worn off with no lasting effects. “McCoy seems to feel he’ll recover soon. I think he’s just being cautious, keeping him there so long. With everything he’s been through recently...”

“That’s true.” Mitchell hesitated. “And Captain Tracy? What’s going to happen to him?”

Now that was an unpleasant situation. Kirk would never have dreamed that Ron Tracy would disobey the Prime Directive to such a degree. They all bent the rules from time to time, but to blatantly use the advanced power of the Federation to influence the course of a planet. "That’s not up to me. After we drop him off at Starbase Four, it’s in Starfleet’s hands.”

“Too bad about Galloway.” Mitchell glanced at Kirk. “I hear they’re going to have some kind of informal service for him.”

“Yes. He was a good officer.” Kirk’s demeanor tensed. He hated losing a crew member. And Lieutenant Galloway had been with the ship for a long time.

“I didn’t know he was an amateur chemist, though.”

“Amateur chemist? What are you talking about?” Kirk looked at Mitchell in surprise.

“When they cleaned out his cabin they found bottles of different chemicals stashed in his bathroom. Guess he was really into that.”

“Where are the chemicals now?”

Mitchell shrugged. “I don’t know. I’d imagine in storage somewhere.”

Kirk turned and walked to the nearest intercom. “No, I don’t think so.” He punched on the com. “Kirk to sickbay. McCoy?”

After a few seconds the doctor responded, “What do you need, Jim?”

“Has security taken anything from Galloway’s cabin to sickbay? Chemicals of any sort?”

“Not that I know of. Hold on a sec.”

Kirk could hear McCoy talking to Chapel in the background. There was the slam of cabinet doors and then McCoy got back on the line. “Sure did. Where did he get all this stuff?”

“I don’t know, but I want you to go through it right now. Find out what’s in it and get back to me. Kirk out.” He rubbed his chin, not liking the direction his thoughts were taking.

“What’s the matter, Jim?”

Kirk looked back at Mitchell. “How well did you know Lieutenant Galloway?”

“Pretty well. We went on shore leave together a few times.”

“Did he have a problem with anyone on the ship?”

Mitchell seemed to hesitate. “I, uh...”

“What? Gary if you have anything to say that might mean anything...”

“You’re not going to like it, but here goes. I was complaining about Mr. Spock to him one time, you know, right after he called me on the carpet about the Psi 2000 episode.”

Kirk waved his hand in impatience. “I know about that. Get on with what you and Galloway talked about.”

“Well, Galloway started going on about how much he disliked Spock, that he didn’t think a Vulcan should be in a position of power over humans. He thought something should be done about it.”

“Galloway said that?” Kirk was surprised. He never would have thought that of the man.

“McCoy to Captain Kirk.” The intercom went off, and Kirk immediately answered, “What did you find, Bones?”

“I think we have our attempted murderer, Jim. The poison used on Spock is here, in with a bunch of other nasty concoctions.”

“I’ll be right down. Kirk out.” He turned to Mitchell, shaking his head. “I guess that’s that.”

“I guess you never know someone like you think,” Mitchell replied. “Hey, if you’re on your way to sickbay, mind if I tag along? There’s a certain Vulcan there I need to talk to.”

Kirk nodded, still thinking about Galloway. It was a relief to know Spock was out out danger, but it saddened him to think he had been so wrong about the lieutenant. he motioned to Mitchell, and the two men headed for sickbay.

^^^^^

It hadn’t been as hard as he thought it would be, apologizing to the Vulcan. It still amazed Mitchell how easy it was to lie to his captain, even if it was for his friend’s sake. He wasn’t going to let his feelings for the science officer get in the way of his and Kirk’s friendship. He’d noticed the way Kirk was distancing himself from him, and he knew he’d do anything to allay his captain’s fears. Kirk had to trust him. Especially since it seemed he was the only one Kirk _could_ trust.

 

“Captain, Ambassador Sarek and his wife _are_ my parents,” Spock intoned.

Mitchell watched the surprise blossom on Kirk’s face as they stood at attention, welcoming their guests. He knew Kirk well enough to know that whatever else he felt, his captain wasn’t about to show it in front of anyone.

“Mr. Mitchell, report to the bridge. Have Mr. Scott set course for the Babel Conference,” Kirk ordered, but his attention was on his first officer.

“Yes, sir,” Mitchell replied, and started down the corridor, turning just in time to see Kirk leave with the Vulcan Ambassador and his wife, a troubled look on his face. He grinned. So, Mr. Spock’s parents were the ambassador from Vulcan and his wife. Interesting how Kirk didn’t know that. The two men had been spending a lot of time together, a _lot_ of time together. That was obviously going to change.

^^^^^

Kirk pulled his uniform off and headed for the shower. The last diplomat was finally off his ship, and things could settle back to normal. Stepping into the stall, he set the temperature high, letting the steaming liquid pound his body. He needed to relax, loosen up.

After ten minutes or so, he stepped out and toweled off. Spock would be here any minute for their long overdue talk. He had been madder than hell at the way he had learned who Spock’s parents were, mad enough to have stepped back from the Vulcan, emotionally. At first, what with Sarek illness, the attack on the ship, and his own injury, he had been able to shove the hurt aside. But once the emergencies were over, and he and Spock were both confined to sickbay, Kirk’s hurt and anger had resurfaced. Spock had picked up on it immediately.

The Vulcan had been released from sickbay after only twenty-four hours, and had been waiting at the door when his captain was released sixteen hours later. Spock had requested, strike that, hell, he had demanded a meeting with him. Kirk had put him off for two day. Now it was time.

He decided on jeans and a t-shirt. Maybe the informality of it all would help. He was still hurt, but he really didn’t want this state of affairs to go on. He missed Spock.

They hadn’t had time to explore the subtle change in their relationship after their return from Gamma Seginus II. One mission after the other had interfered, unexpected emergencies keeping them on alert...and apart. But Kirk had known that soon they would deal with the feelings both held. Or, at least, he had thought they both did.

It scared him, the thought that Spock didn’t feel what he did. Over the several weeks that had passed, Kirk’s feelings for his friend had only grown, the desire a white-hot need. He loved Spock, wanted them together...always. If Spock didn’t want this, if there was something, or someone, that would keep them apart, how would he deal with having the Vulcan near, but not his?

He settled at his desk, trying to remain calm. But he jumped, startled, and signaled the door to open at the first sound of the tone.

Spock stood a moment at the doorway before slowly walking in, a wary look in his eyes. He was dressed in a loose gray tunic and pants, and to Kirk’s surprise, had what looked like sandals on his feet.

“Captain.” Spock bowed his head slightly.

“Have a seat, Mr. Spock.“ Kirk motioned to the chair in front of the desk.

Spock sat silently for a while, as if gathering his thoughts. Finally, he cleared his throat. “I wish to apologize for any embarrassment or...hurt I may have caused you due to my inexcusable lapse. I should have told you, earlier, who my parents are.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“I am not sure. Perhaps because of the estrangement between my father and myself, I did not believe that he would speak of it.”

“Yes, your mother mentioned there was a problem between you two.”

Spock grimaced. “Yes, a problem. As you may have surmised, my father was not in favor of my joining Starfleet. Since that day, over eighteen years ago, we had not spoken.”

“Never?” Kirk asked, unable to fathom such a breach between father and son,” What about when you went to Vulcan, during your...you know, during your marriage?”

Spock’s eyes filled with such pain that Kirk could not stop himself. He got up and came around the desk, pulled another chair over and sat next to the Vulcan. “Tell me.”

Spock closed his eyes for a moment. He swallowed nervously and then began to speak. “There was no marriage, at least, not one that you would have recognized. My...bride was waiting for me at the place of challenge, the arena where my family has gone for millennia to claim their mate. She was not alone.”

“Not alone? I don’t understand.” Kirk shifted, bringing his body closer, as if to lend physical support.

“She refused me, did not desire me as a mate. That is her right. She was accompanied by her champion, the one whose victory she hoped would free her from my claim.”

“You fought?” Kirk was horrified. It had never occurred to him that anything could go wrong once he had managed to get Spock to Vulcan on time.

“Yes.”

“And who won?”

Spock almost smiled, a bitter smile of infinite sorrow. “I did. But, Jim,” He looked directly into Kirk’s eyes, “The fight is to the death.”

“Oh, Spock.” Kirk instinctively reached out, wrapping his arms around the rigid figure and pulling him close. After a moment, he felt his friend relax into the embrace and his hands settle on Kirk’s waist. “What happened then?”

Spock slowly shook his head, his words muffled against Kirk’s chest. “I did not want her, but I needed her in order to survive. So I...took what I needed.”

“Dear god.” He brought one hand up to stroke the fine strands of hair pressed against his shoulder. “I’m so sorry, Spock. So very sorry.”

They sat in a loose embrace for several minutes. Kirk had thought that was all of it until Spock began to speak again.

“I did not know the depth of despair one can sink to until that day. She had forced me to kill, and yet she would be the mother of my children.” Spock’s voice choked, the sound harsh in the quiet room.

“Is she?” Kirk whispered, “Is there a child?”

“No. Never have I been so grateful for my hybrid status.”

“Because—”

“I am sterile. And I am glad of it. Once it was determined that she had not quickened with child, I was allowed to rid myself of her.”

“You were divorced?”

“We were never truly married. Because she dared challenge, and lost, I am not accountable for her welfare. It is as if none of it had ever been.”

“But a man died. What about him?”

“Stonn? His life lost all meaning when he agreed to be her champion. What they did is legal, but is considered anathema. No Vulcan man will ever bond with her, no one will mourn his passing.”

“Good lord. Here I thought I had got you safely home. Your nightmare had just begun.” He unconsciously pulled Spock tighter. “Why didn’t you say anything before?”

“What could I say? There was nothing you could do. It was over and done.”

“Spock, what about next time?”

“I do not understand.”

“The next time you go into this thing...pon farr?”

“I do not know.”

“Could...could you die?”

“It is a possibility. But it is also possible that I may never experience it again. I am no longer linked to anyone. Perhaps-”

“But you don’t know.” Kirk’s hand tightened in Spock’s hair, pulling the Vulcan’s head up so that their faces were inches apart, their lips almost touching. “You don’t know. I couldn’t bear to lose you. I need you, Spock, so much...”

The Vulcan only stared at first, but slowly his arms pulled Kirk in, so that finally their bodies were touching, their chests pressed against each other. “Jim, please...”

“Yes? What is it _you_ need, Spock?”

“You. I need you.”

With that pronouncement, Kirk found himself swept into the vortex of passion that was Spock of Vulcan. Their lips met, tentatively at first, but with each kiss their hunger grew, until they were devouring each other, the long months of denial finally over.

“Wait, wait.” Kirk pulled back, breaking Spock’s hold on him. He stood up and, reaching out his hand, pulled Spock to his feet. “Come on. Let’s do this right.”

They walked to the sleeping area, and Kirk lowered the lights as he hit the lock control to his door. He pulled his shirt partially off, his arms still within its sleeves as he waited for Spock to follow his lead. When the Vulcan began removing his shoes, Kirk grinned and rapidly finished undressing.

He slipped under the covers, holding them open for Spock to join him. The Vulcan lay down and gathered him into his arms, returning to the interrupted kiss. Slowly, his hand slides down Kirk’s body, settling on his hips and pulling him closer. Their groins came together, and Kirk moaned his pleasure. He could feel Spock’s hard, pulsing cock nestled next to his own.

The kiss continued, their tongues entwining, tasting deep of each other, until Spock broke off his plundering of Kirk’s mouth to explore the rest of his body. Starting at his neck, he trailed kisses down the broad chest, down to the taut stomach and muscled thighs. “I have desired this for so long,” Spock whispered between gentle sucks on Kirk’s skin.

“How long?” His hands reached out to pull at Spock’s hip, communicating his desire.

“Since the day you came to me in sickbay and offered your friendship.” Spock swung his lower body over, bringing his groin within reach of Kirk’s mouth. “No one had ever treated me as you did. I wanted all of you.”

“You have all of me.” Kirk came up on an elbow and started returning Spock’s caresses, licking and sucking at the lean body next to his. The thick, needing column of flesh enticed him, and he leaned down to take the Vulcan’s cock into his mouth.

Spock moaned, “Oh, yes, Jim.” He wrapped his hand around Kirk’s penis, slowly pumping it to the languid rhythm of his own hips. He looked down, his senses overloading at the sight of his captain sucking his cock.

Kirk’s hands strayed over the Vulcan’s body, memorizing the sharpness of hip, the flat stomach, and the neat roundness of his ass. He trailed his finger down between Spock’s buttocks, pressing a finger into the puckered orifice. The cry from his lover only made him suck harder, while driving his finger deep into Spock’s body. Suddenly, his mouth filled with the unique flavor of Spock’s semen, the Vulcan’s body convulsing in orgasm.

He pulled his finger from his lover’s body, but continued to lap at the slowly deflating cock, stopping only when he felt Spock’s heated mouth descend on his organ, taking it all in, the Vulcan’s throat muscles constricting around its head.

“Oh, god,” Kirk threw his head back, one hand coming down on the back of Spock’s head. He held on, his fingers intwining in Spock’s hair as his cock was sucked, caressed by the Vulcan’s tongue and mouth, Spock’s hands clutching at his ass.

“Oh, yes, love, there, right there,” Kirk panted, his hips pistoning as he buried his cock into the Vulcan’s mouth. He knew he was close, and all it took was Spock’s hand coming to rest in his, clasping it tightly, to push him over the edge. With a low moan of ecstasy he came, his sperm spewing forth to be greedily swallowed by his lover.

With a last gentle pull, Spock fell back against the bed, releasing the spent organ. After a moment, he crawled over and lay next to his lover, sliding his arm under Kirk and nestling him against his chest. “You are everything to me. You always shall be.”

“I certainly hope so, Mister, because I’m not letting you get away. You’re stuck with me now.” Kirk looked up and smiled, his hand on Spock’s chest toying with the soft hair. “I’ve never had a male lover, you know.”

“I was not sure, though I did not believe so. I am illogically pleased at the confirmation.” Spock closed his hand over Kirk’s. “It is the same for me.”

“Is it? I’m glad, too. Maybe I’m selfish, but I don’t think I’d like the idea of you having done that with anyone else.” He thought a moment. “It’s funny. I know you’ve been with women, but somehow that doesn’t bother me...of course, you can’t have any more.”

“You are aware that you are constrained by the same rule, are you not?” Spock teased.

“Uh huh.” Kirk’s eyes were refusing to stay open. “Spock?”

“Yes?” The same sleepiness was evident in the Vulcan’s voice.

“Are we bonded?”

“No, t’hy’la, not yet.”

“Soon?” Kirk yawned.

“Yes, very soon.”

“Good.”

After that, there was only the sounds of the ship as the two men slept.

^^^^^

Spock turned and pulled the cool body closer. He opened his eyes, startled by the head of sandy hair inches away from his. Then memory flooded back, and he hid a smile within the silky strands, breathing in the scent of the beloved human.

Jim. His t’hy’la, and soon, his bondmate. Never would Spock have imagined this outcome. Wished for it, dreamed of it, yes. But to actually be granted what he wanted more than anything else? Truly, there were many wonders in the universe. He felt his lover stir, and pulled up on his elbow to look down on the waking human.

Kirk looked up, rubbing his hands over his face. “’Morning.”

“Good morning.” Spock leaned over to plant a chaste kiss on Kirk’s brow.

“Is that all I get?”

“It is five thirty five. We do not have the time for ‘that’.”

“Killjoy.” Kirk looked over at the chronometer. “But I guess you’re right. Wouldn’t look good for both the captain and first officer to be late for work.”

“No, it would not.” Spock bit his lip, “Jim...”

“Yeah?” Kirk sat up and swung his legs over the edge of the bed.

“What if the crew were to find out?”

“About us? Then they find out.” He leaned over and kissed Spock on the mouth, a kiss of promise. “I might not shout it from the rooftops, but I’m not ashamed of what we have. If they find out and don’t like it, well, that’s their problem.”

“And Starfleet?”

“I don’t think Starfleet’s going to have a problem with it. We’re both of command rank, we’re both single and we’re both adults. As long as we do our job, they won’t complain. Besides, once we bond, there won’t be anything they _can_ do about it.”

“That is true. Vulcan demanded that such a stipulation be written into the regulations as a condition of their joining the Federation. A bonded couple cannot be separated.”

“Well, there you go.” Kirk stood up and headed for the bathroom. “Come on. I’m looking forward to showering with you. It’s got to be a ‘fascinating’ experience.”

With a contented sigh, Spock got out of bed and followed his lover into the shower. He had a feeling things were just getting interesting.

^^^^^

Gary Mitchell had his own ideas of what was going on between his captain, his erstwhile friend, and the Vulcan. And he didn’t like it much. The guards that had followed the first officer for months had been removed. But now Kirk seemed to have taken over the role. Mitchell couldn’t count the times he had seen the two together, on or off duty.

“Activate main viewing screen.” Kirk’s voice was underlined with a still unresolved tension.

Mitchell turned and checked out his captain. Kirk was sitting in the center chair, McCoy at his side. The hazel eyes were glued to the screen that now showed the stars clear of any obstruction. They were all safe, except perhaps one expendable Vulcan.

“Mr. Mitchell, report.” Kirk turned and looked toward the science station.

“The organism is destroyed, sir. The explosion must have ruptured the membrane and thrown us clear.” Mitchell looked up from the viewer, and headed back to his own station.

“Power coming back on, Sir.” Mr. Scott turned to his captain, relief washing over his face.

“Shuttlecraft?”

“I don’t know how, sir, but it’s still with us.”

“Shuttlecraft to _Enterprise,_ shuttlecraft to _Enterprise._ Request permission to come aboard.”

The Vulcan’s voice over the intercom brought an instant change in the atmosphere of the bridge. Kirk smiled, his joy overwhelming as he punched the intercom control with his fist. “Spock! You’re alive!”

“Obviously, Captain, and I have fascinating data on the orgasm.”

“Don’t be so smart, Spock. You botched the acetylcholine test,” McCoy interjected, though it was plain to Mitchell that the doctor was almost as happy to hear the Vulcan’s voice as Kirk was.

“Later, later, later.” Kirk laughed in relief. “ Bring the shuttlecraft aboard, Mr. Scott.”

“Aye, Sir.”

When the shuttle was brought safely aboard, Mitchell lay in the course for Starbase Six, per Kirk’s orders. He turned to see Kirk and McCoy leave the bridge, the turbo lift having deposited their shift replacements. Kirk was obviously on his way to the shuttle bay, and Spock. When he had picked the Vulcan to go out, meet the thing that was slowly leaching the life from all of them, it had been obvious to everyone that it was killing the captain. Mitchell waited a few minutes before handing his station over, and then made his way to the turbo.

“Shuttlebay.” He was alone in the turbo, and made his destination quickly. The corridors were empty. This part of the ship tended to get little traffic, and right after a shift change would be deserted. Mitchell cautiously exited the turbo, looking both ways. He vaguely heard voices off to his right, and preceded silently toward them.

He peered around the corner and spotted Kirk and Mr. Spock walking down the darkened corridor, talking quietly. Suddenly, Kirk grabbed the Vulcan’s arm, and pushing him against the wall, wrapped an arm around his neck and brought them together in a heated kiss.

“Dear god, I thought I’d lost you,” Kirk fiercely whispered between his plundering of Spock’s mouth.

Mitchell froze in amazement, unable to look away from the two men.

“You will never lose me.” Spock’s arms had wrapped around Kirk’s waist, pulling their bodies together, hard.

He couldn’t believe this. Jim Kirk, making love to his male first officer. He thought he knew Kirk, but this was something he never would have dreamed, no matter what Kirk’s duplicate from the other universe had implied. He felt sick, the sight of the two men locked in an embrace, the moans and wet sounds as they kissed each other, turning his stomach. Unable to watch anymore, he slowly backed away. He returned to the turbo, falling to his knees as the doors closed on him. What now? He had to think, figure out what to do.

Like a spotlight pointing it out, it dawned on him. The Vulcan must have used his mental powers on Kirk, forced him into the relationship. Of course, that had to be it, probably during that meld Spock had insisted was only to stop Kirk’s pain. Somehow, he had to break the hold Spock had on the captain. This time, he’d make sure the Vulcan died.

^^^^^

Spock stroked his hand down Kirk’s chest, the sweat drying as the human’s breath returned to normal. He reached up to the headboard and grabbed the cloth they kept handy for times like these. He carefully cleaned the evidence of their lovemaking from Kirk’s belly, skirting around the still sensitive penis. He wiped himself clean and threw the towel on the floor.

“That’s not like you.” Kirk teased. “Tired?”

“You have thoroughly depleted me.” Spock lay back down, resting his head on his bended arm. “I shall deal with it...later.”

“Hmm, you seemed to enjoy it.” Kirk stretched, and resettled himself closer to his bed mate.

“There is nothing about you I do not enjoy. You are all things to me.”

“Am I?” Kirk grew serious. “Then what about what we were talking about yesterday?”

“Jim... it is not something lightly gone into.”

“Don’t you think I’ve thought it out? I have. There’s no reason in the world why we can’t bond, right here, right now. And every reason in the world why we shouldn’t wait.”

Spock watched the firepot’s flickering light cast shadows over his lover’s face, deepening the frown that creased his brow. Kirk seemed to prefer Spock’s cabin when it came to their lovemaking, rarely sleeping in his own anymore. He had teasingly stated that it was more “romantic,” but right now, it only seemed to add to the tension settling over the human. “The organism.”

“Is only one reason. After our little public exhibition, I just feel it would be safer if we were bonded, _before_ anyone finds out.”

Spock frowned, remembering their response to each other. They had both been shocked by their lack of control. True, they had only kissed, but if someone had seen them... "But we have already promised each other that we would not repeat such a display.”

Kirk snorted, “Sure we have. But are you going to lie there and tell me that you’re absolute positive we never will...ever?”

“Perhaps you are right,” Spock sighed. “Though I would prefer to perform the bonding away from the ship, somewhere where we would be assured privacy, I would not be adverse to bonding us in these less than ideal circumstances.”

“Right now?”

Spock smiled slightly. “ No, not now, t’hy’la. It must be done during sexual intercourse, ideally at the moment of orgasm. I fear neither of us is capable at this time of the sustained energy required.”

“When then? Tomorrow night?”

“If that is what you wish, I would be pleased to bond us at that time.” Spock pulled the human’s body closer. “The idea of us being one is very much what _I_ wish.”

“Okay. There shouldn’t be any problem. We’ll be in orbit in the morning. We can beam down with McCoy, check out what we can do to either deflect the asteroid or relocate any inhabitants. After that, it’s back to star mapping. It’ll be quiet for a while.”

“I have worked out the figures for-”

The signal from his com-link interrupted him, and both men looked up.

“Were you expecting someone to call?” Kirk asked, surprised.

“No, no one. Perhaps it is the lab. We are working on a particularly sensitive procedure. Timing is vital to its success.” He stood up, taking time to shrug into his robe. He walked over to his desk and hit the switch to open up the channel. There was a flash of light and then his world went dark.

^^^^^

Kirk paced within the outer office of sickbay, wringing his hands and fighting the panic growing in his gut. The explosion had torn apart Spock’s computer terminal, imbedding pieces of it in Spock’s face and hands. The force of it had thrown the Vulcan across the room, his broken form landing in a smoldering heap at the foot of the bed.

Kirk had jumped up, his first concern getting the burning robe off Spock. He remembered calling for McCoy, and then kneeling down next to his lover, holding him gently, afraid of letting go. _Please, god, not again, not now._

McCoy had rushed in, the doors opening to his medical override, and had skidded to a halt in shocked surprise at finding his captain, naked, next to the equally unclothed form of the first officer. Whatever he might have thought, the doctor quickly recovered and knelt down next to the men. “Jim, let me see what’s going on, okay?”

Perhaps it had been the shock, but Kirk had found himself complacently giving in, standing aside to allow McCoy and the two medical technicians room to work on Spock. He hadn’t even bothered to dress, a robe his only concession to modesty. He had wanted to follow them immediately as they wheeled the still form of his lover to sickbay, but command training had finally kicked in. He walked through the connecting bathroom to his quarters and, throwing on his uniform, became the captain once more. He ordered a security team to Spock’s cabin, and another to sickbay. Only then did he make the journey to stand here, waiting to hear if Spock would live or die.

Who was behind this? Kirk ran a shaking hand through his hair. They had gotten careless, thinking the threat behind them, too wrapped up in their new relationship. He glanced again at the door leading to surgery. They had been in there for hours.

He finally took a seat at McCoy’s desk, and turned on the terminal to call up the duty roster for the last week’s service. Somewhere on this list was Spock’s would-be murderer. He scrolled through the list, trying to place the names and faces to motive and opportunity.

Hours later, he was jarred from the uneasy sleep he had fallen into, his head resting on his folded arms. He sat up, instantly awake, to find McCoy standing over him. “How is he?”

McCoy took the seat next to him. “He’s in a healing trance. There was quite a bit of damage to some internal organs, mainly his heart. I went in, did what I could. The burns weren’t too bad. I’ve got plasti-skin on him to help with the healing. The rest was mainly cuts and bruises. But, Jim, it’s not a sure thing, not yet. It’s up to him, now.”

“Can I see him?” Hadn’t he been here before? Heard these same lines, asked these same questions?

“Sure, he’s in the back room. He probably can hear you, but don’t stay too long. He needs to concentrate on what he’s doing.” McCoy gave him a gentle smile. “And you’re probably quite a distraction for a certain Vulcan we know.”

“Thanks, Bones.” Kirk cleared his throat, his emotions in a state of flux. “I’ll only stay a moment.”

The room was warm, the lights set to a reddish glow. Kirk stood at the side of the bed, watching the slow rise and fall of his lover’s chest. Spock was so still, so pale. _Like death_. He mentally shook himself. _Don’t go there. He’s going to live. I won’t allow anything else._

“I’m going to find whoever did this to you. And when I do...” He clenched his fists onto the bed railing, fighting the anger that was threatening to eat him alive. He abruptly turned, and headed for the bridge.

^^^^^

Kirk fidgeted in the command chair, fighting fatigue and the bone-jarring headache that had started at the base of his skull and then spread to pound against his temples. He rubbed his forehead, wishing he could be somewhere else, in sickbay at Spock’s side, or on the planet leading the landing party. But he knew he had no right to do the first, and was in no shape for the second. Instead, he had sent Mitchell down with Chapel and an ensign from the science department.

That was three hours ago. The ensign, _what the hell was his name?_ had stumbled across an ancient obelisk, its sides covered with some sort of hieroglyphic writing. Even now, the entire linguistics department was frantically trying to decipher them. He knew they would have to leave soon in order to deflect the asteroid in time, but he wanted to give his people the time, on the small chance that _this_ would be the key to solving their problem.

“Mitchell to _Enterprise._ ”

“Got anything, Gary?” Kirk asked.

“I think so, Captain. Seems we have a science officer in the making down here. Ensign Chekov was trying different frequencies on his tricorder, trying to see if he could scan into the obelisk. Somehow, the noise the thing made accidentally opened it up. He’s down there now, checking it out.

“That’s great. I’ll send Scotty down, see if he can figure out how that thing works. Kirk out.” He contacted the engineer, relaxing into the knowledge that they were half way home with this. There wasn’t a machine in existence the Scot couldn’t make work. He turned to the communications officer. “Uhura, I’ll be in sickbay. Have Mr. Scott reach me there as soon as he knows anything.”

Leaving Sulu the com, he headed for the turbolift.

^^^^^

Mitchell watched the three young women as they knelt beside the stream. Two of them were carrying large clay jugs and filling them with water. The third held onto a basket full of rushes.

He inched closer, trying for a better look. They looked like Amerindians, the same dress and color. He couldn’t take his eyes off the third one. Taller than her companions, she was darkly beautiful with a willowy, but rounded figure. Here was someone worth taking time for.

Mr. Scott had effectively taken over the landing party, bringing two of his engineers with him, the three men fawning over that shrimp, Chekov. Anyone could have done what the ensign had. By sheer accident, he had managed to save the planet. No telling the Scot that. He had praised the boy for his quick thinking, and Mitchell had found himself pushed aside in favor of the “bonny lad.” Fine, he had better things to do. Stepping forward, he brought his phaser up and fired.

^^^^^

At first, all he could manage was a gasp for breath. But he continued his struggle, until finally forming the words that would bring him home. “Strike me.”

“Spock? Spock, it’s Jim.” Kirk’s fingers curled around his wrist.

“Strike me, please.” Spock felt himself pulled to a sitting position, and a hand come down across his face. “Again.”

The blows continued, and Spock felt himself rising out of his trance, reaching for the essence that streamed through the contact on his wrist. With one last surge, he gained consciousness, and grabbed the hand as it swung through. “That should suffice.”

Kirk’s smile greeted him, the human barely keeping his joy in check. “I’ll go get Bones.” Kirk turned to leave the room, but not without a backward glance at the doorway before going for the doctor.

Spock lay back down. He was tired, but the pain of his injuries was gone. He remembered the explosion, and then Kirk huddled over him as they waited for help to arrive. After that, nothing. It seemed whoever wished him dead stilled lived, had not been the unfortunate Lieutenant Galloway. They would have to be on guard, alert to anything out of the ordinary. Spock grimaced. For such as this to mar the contentment he felt....

“Well, how’s my favorite patient?” McCoy walked in, with Kirk right behind him. The doctor turned on the panel over the bed and began to check the readings, “Looks pretty good, if I do say so myself.”

“Does that mean you’re releasing him?” Kirk’s tone was hopeful.

“Now, did I say that?” McCoy switched off the machine, and began running his medical tricorder over Spock’s body.

“Doctor, I do not understand your need to reexamine what your equipment has already verified,” Spock’s patience was wearing thin. He wanted out of here, as quickly as possible.

“Who’s the doctor here, me or you?” McCoy glared. “You’ll get out of here when I say you can, and that won’t be until I’m satisfied you’re fit to leave. You were in a healing trance for almost two days.”

Spock put up with another twenty point three minutes of McCoy’s questions and intrusive physical examinations, but was finally released into his captain’s custody with specific instructions that he not leave his cabin for another twenty-four hours. In that, the doctor received no argument from either man. They walked together to Spock’s cabin, the two guards trailing behind, back on duty.

Kirk remained quiet until they entered Spock’s cabin. “I’ve had the place swept for any other surprises. It’s clean.” He sat down at the foot of the bed, motioning Spock to sit beside him. “I guess we really blew it, didn’t we? Caught off guard like that.”

“We believed the danger to be over.”

“Maybe.” Kirk gave him an rueful look. “But the more I think about it, the more I think I wanted to believe that it was over, and jumped at the chance to assign blame. If it was Galloway behind it, we could spend our time together without anyone around. Well, Mr. Spock, we’re just going to have to get used to your guards, because you’re not going anywhere without them anymore, is that understood?”

Spock sighed. He had known this was coming. “Yes, Captain.”

Kirk threw his arm around him. “Hey, it’s not like we have anything to hide, anymore. After the other night, it’s pretty common knowledge that you and I are together.”

“Indeed?”

“Uh huh. Finding the captain and his first officer in the all-together during their sleep tour pretty much gave the game away.”

“Are you sorry, Jim?” Spock turned to look at his lover.

“No. I may have preferred it remain our secret for a while longer, but sorry that people know that I care that much for you, and that it’s returned? How could I be sorry about that?” He kissed Spock on the lips, a gentle, closed-mouthed kiss between lovers, and stood up. “Get some rest. I’ll be back after my shift. Things are almost cleared up on the planet and then we’ll be heading for Starbase Eleven and some well-deserved R and R.” He was almost to the door when he turned to ask, “By the way, who’s this Ensign Chekov from your department?”

“He was assigned three weeks ago. He came on board at our last stop as a replacement and has been working in the lab under Fields, head of the life-sciences department. Why do you ask?”

“He inadvertently saved the day down there. Maybe I should keep an eye on him, see if he’s bridge material.”

“I am sure he would be most appreciative.”

“Okay, I’ll look into it.”

After Kirk left, Spock lay down and lowered the lights, throwing the room into dim shadows. He was still quite tired. The healing trance tended to draw all excess energy from the body, leaving it depleted. He did not wish to be in such a state on Kirk’s return.

^^^^^

Kirk entered the mess hall and headed for the food replicators. He figured a couple of dinner salads and soup, tomato for him, vegetable for Spock, would do the trick. While standing in line, he glanced idly around the room. He had left the bridge a little early, wanting to beat the rush, but there were already a few crew members sitting at the tables.

He tried being nonchalant about it but he couldn’t help wondering what they were thinking. So far, everyone had been very proper. He laughed silently to himself. Well, almost everyone. There had been a few, like Uhura, who had seemed almost ecstatic about the news. Even Bones seemed to have taken to the new situation with aplomb.

Mostly though, questions about Spock were couched in terms that made it clear that they were asking the captain, not the Vulcan’s lover. He hoped it continued that way, for Spock’s benefit more so than his own. He started gathering his selections, relieved that their new relationship didn’t look to be a problem for the crew.

“That’s a lot of food for one person, Jim.”

He turned to see Mitchell standing behind him, his tray balanced against one hip. “I’m taking Mr. Spock his dinner. He’s not allowed out of his quarters tonight...doctor’s orders.”

“How very convenient,” Mitchell drawled as he turned to punch up his selection.

Kirk frowned, and then turned to finish gathering his selections. “What happened to your face, Gary?”

Mitchell brought his hand up and touched the scratches running down his left cheek, “They’re nothing. I, uh, ran into a tree. You know, on that planet.”

That didn’t sound right somehow, but Kirk let it go, his own concerns on his mind. He nodded and started for the exit.

“Can I talk to you for a minute, Captain?” Mitchell put his tray down on a nearby table and motioned Kirk over.

He hesitated a moment but then walked back to the table, keeping hold of his tray. He wasn’t staying long. “What it is you need, Gary?”

I hear we’re heading for Starbase Eleven.”

“That’s right.”

“I thought we might spend some time together, maybe look up Tina and Kelly. Be like old-home week.”

He stared at his friend, unable to figure if the man was being sincere, or trying to be funny. “I don’t think so, Gary. I’ve already made other plans. Maybe next time.”

“What plans would that be?”

“Spock and I have a cabin rented. We’re going to just kick back and relax for a few days.”

“How about McCoy? He gonna...chaperone you two?” Mitchell gave the words an ugly connotation.

“No,” Kirk said in a quiet voice. “It’s going to be just me and Spock.”

“I see.”

“Do you, Mr. Mitchell? I’m glad. I don’t want there to be any misunderstanding about it.” He gave the navigator a long look and then headed out the door. Apparently, his earlier reflections had been way too optimistic.

^^^^^

They materialized just before sunset, the shadows of the trees circling the small cabin like elongated soldiers, guarding their retreat. A shiver of expectation coursed through Spock’s body, for it would be here that he and Kirk would form their eternal union.

“Well, here we are.” Kirk walked up on the porch, surveying their home for the next two days. Not fifty feet away the lake shimmered with the last rays of the setting sun, and the forest behind them whispered the wind’s song. He looked at Spock. “Beautiful, simply beautiful.”

Spock smiled and followed Kirk as he entered the cabin.

It was cold and dark inside, so they spent their first hour getting a fire going, working by candlelight until they were able to locate the power controls. Heat gushed from the floor vents as lights came on through the small dwelling.

“I think I almost liked it better, before.” Kirk gazed around the main room. Rustic, almost to the point of spartan, the harsh artificial light destroyed the soft, romantic air candlelight had given it.

“It shall always shine as a place of unimagined beauty in my memory.” Spock stared intently from across the room. He had felt his lover’s pull as the time had drawn nearer, the mind that called to his and begged to become one. He walked over and took the smaller man in an embrace, burying his face in the small of Kirk’s neck and breathing in the male scent that intoxicated him. “I need you, Jim. I need you now.”

“Maybe we should check out the upstairs,” Kirk whispered seductively, and tugged at Spock’s waist where his hands had settled. He reached down and grabbed the valise he had brought and turned toward the stairs.

Together, they made their way up the narrow staircase that led to the upper floor and the bedroom awaiting them. It, too, was sparsely furnished, but neither of them was aware any longer of such details. In unvoiced agreement, they deposited the two small bags they had brought on the dresser and began to unpack. Each showered in the tiny stall, Kirk first. So when Spock stepped out of the bathroom, his robe loosely tied, it was to the sight of his lover stretched out on the bed, the covers draping his lower body.

“Care to join me?” Kirk smiled and pulled the covers aside in welcome.

He removed his robe and slid in next to the human, wrapping his arms around Kirk to pull him closer. “You are always so cool to the touch, as if made to quench the fire that has always burned in me. I never knew until we came together how high that fire burned, the need growing in me to fulfill myself within you.”

“My romantic Vulcan.” Kirk hands slid down Spock’s body, coming to rest on his hips. “We both burn. God, the things you do to me.” He tilted his head up, presenting his mouth to be taken in an openmouthed kiss.

Spock felt he would devour the man beneath him, his tongue sliding into the welcoming orifice, the kiss deepening. The noises Kirk made, his body undulating beneath his, was bringing Spock to a fever pitch. He explored his lover, the wide, strong back, the muscular thighs, the full buttock his hands seemed to mold around of their own volition. He pulled Kirk tightly against him, until their cocks pressed firmly against each other and the human moaned in desperate arousal.

“oh, god, Spock.” Kirk brought his hands up to clutch at Spock’s hair, pulling his head back. “Now, do it now.”

He fumbled at the bed stand, and grabbed the tube of lubricant Kirk had placed there. Undoing the cap, he squeezed out a generous amount unto his shaking hand.

Kirk grabbed it with his own, smearing the ointment over both their hands and then bringing his down to wrap his oiled fingers around his lover’s shaft.

Spock hissed, the feel of those strong fingers fisting his organ sending spikes of orgasmic shock through his body, centering in his pulsing cock. He pulled away and pushed Kirk’s thighs apart. He moved down further on the bed and leaned over to take his lover’s organ into his mouth, while his hand explored between the spread legs, searching for his ultimate prize.

Kirk moaned as he moved his hips up and down, burying his cock deeper into Spock’s mouth. When his lover’s finger breached the tight ring of his anus, Kirk’s movements became more frantic as he cried out. “Oh, Spock, please.”

“Yes, I want you, yes.” Spock released Kirk’s organ and pushed his finger harder into Kirk’s body, then two, then three, as he brought Kirk to the edge of completion time and time again, only to pull back at the last second. He returned to sucking the human’s penis, Kirk’s pleas of want driving Spock mad with unmet need. He didn’t want to stop, no, not yet. The taste of the human was intoxicating, the full, hard cock in his mouth and the buttery feel enclosing the fingers buried deep in Kirk’s body like a drug, and it was only the frantic need of his mind that finally made Spock pull back.

He knelt between the human’s legs, throwing them over his shoulders and looking down at the human, Kirk’s chest heaving, the sweat glistening off him. “You are mine, now and forever, mine.”

“Yes, god, yes. Just do it...do it now!”

He grabbed Kirk’s buttocks with both hands, spreading him wide, and with one quick lunge buried himself in the human, his cock stretching and filling the welcoming sheath.

Kirk gasped and bucked up, taking Spock deeper into himself. It impaled him over and over, Spock’s grunts echoing each thrust of his cock. He grabbed his lover’s arms, rocking himself up to meet each lunge, moaning with each slide of the organ against his prostate, each press of fullness as it shoved up inside his body.

Spock threw his head back, panting, on fire, and blindly settled his hand on Kirk’s face. The explosion of orgasm swept through him, and he cried out his lover’s name as he buried his seed into the waiting body. “Jim, yes, JIM!”

The bond came alive and shook him, held him in an embrace of passion, and then doubled back through the link, smashing into Kirk’s dazed consciousness. The human screamed and came, his semen spewing out to cover their bellies.

^^^^^

Kirk came to, the weight of his bondmate pressed heavy on him. He looked around almost in a daze. He had never had such mind-blowing sex...literally. He focused on Spock’s face, inches from his own. Cast in shadows by the moonlight filtering in from the window, nevertheless, Kirk could see the change in his lover. The joy Spock felt was palpable, his countenance set in the relaxed lines of contentment.

“How you doing?” Kirk brought his hand up and ran his fingers through the mussed strands of Spock’s hair.

“I am well,” Spock said, a lazy smile playing over his lips. It was a smile Kirk didn’t ever remember seeing on his lover before.

“Just ‘well’? I feel like I’m floating, like everything is new and fresh—”

“Reborn.”

“Yeah, that’s it exactly. It’s a lucky thing we didn’t do this on the ship. Wouldn’t do for the captain to run around with a silly grin plastered on his face.”

“You will lose this ‘silly grin’?” Spock teased.

“I’ll work on it.” Kirk’s expression became stern for a moment.” How’s that?”

“Ah, the captain I have come to love.” Spock closed his eyes, and then rolled over, pulling himself off Kirk. He lay on his back, silent.

“You okay?” He came up on one elbow, concerned at the sudden change in his lover.

“Just extremely fatigued. It is to be expected. The forming of a bond is very taxing. I will recover quite swiftly after sufficient rest.”

“Okay, lie here.” Kirk got up, and going into the small bathroom, gathered up a couple of towels. He thoroughly soaked one in warm water and then returned to the bed where he proceeded to clean his bondmate, gently wiping down the slender form. He could tell Spock was still awake, though the Vulcan’s eyes never opened.

The bond stretched between them like a silken cord of thought and emotion, tying them together beyond all untying. It gave him a new insight into the man he thought he knew almost as well as himself. He had realized almost from the start how very lonely Spock had been. But only now did he see the quiet desperation that had followed his lover, as the Vulcan struggled with the frightening possibility that his aloneness would never end. Kirk vowed, then and there, that nothing would ever come between them, that he would keep Spock safe, protected from the hurt and cruelty visited on him since childhood. The rush of feelings that swamped him as he looked down on his lover threatened to undo him.

“You’re not alone anymore,” he whispered at the still figure. “You’ll never be alone again.”

Spock reached blindly out, finding Kirk’s hand and holding on tight for a moment. “You have given me my life. It shall always be yours.”

Kirk bent down, kissing Spock chastely on the lips. “I’ll be right back.” He got up and returned to the bathroom. He threw the towels in the hamper placed under the sink, and then stepped into the shower stall. He turned the water on high and let the heated liquid wash over him.

He felt Spock’s seed slowly trickle from his body. It gave him an overwhelming feeling of possessiveness, as if the Vulcan’s claiming of his body had somehow stamped Spock as his. Kirk chuckled at the illogic of it all. They had done this before, Spock penetrating him, as well as the reverse. He had always enjoyed it, the fullness and sense of belonging it brought him. But this...he could feel Spock within him still. Not in the physical sense, but an intangible force that had taken up residence in the very core of his being. He wondered how he had ever lived without it.

He finally stepped out and dried off. He returned to the bed to find his lover soundly asleep, the slow rise and fall of Spock’s chest his only movement. Kirk arranged the blankets and then crawled in next to him, settling into the crook of Spock’s arm. He pulled the covers over them and closed his eyes.

^^^^^

Mitchell pulled the aircar to a stop, close enough to make out the small cabin but far enough away to go unnoticed on the off chance its occupants were up at this early hour. He slowly walked to the small structure, surveying the landscape at the same time. There couldn’t be anyone within miles. He smiled. Perfect.

He got to the door and walked in. _The fools didn’t even bother to lock it_. He scanned the lower rooms, the small living room and the tiny kitchen off to the side. He had figured they wouldn’t be up yet, and sneered at the thought of what he would find upstairs. It disgusted him, knowing that his friend had been seduced by the Vulcan, made to participate in the alien’s unnatural appetites.

Mitchell crept up the narrow staircase; he didn’t want to take the chance of them hearing him, so placed his foot on each step slowly, carefully. He finally reached the top, pushing open the half-closed door.

They lay in bed together, Kirk’s head nestled on the Vulcan’s shoulder, his arm sprawled across Spock’s chest. Mitchell walked up to the bed and pressed the phaser’s barrel into his friend’s back.

Kirk moved slightly, and mumbled something undecipherable. Mitchell jabbed the weapon harder into the sleeping man.

“Spock, cut it out.” Kirk brought his hand around to bat at the irritant. When he touched the metal object he stilled, his eyes flying open in shock.

“That’s right, Jim buddy. Now turn around really slow.” Mitchell backed away.

Kirk glanced at his sleeping partner, and then turned over to face the intruder. “What are you doing here, Gary?”

“Thought I’d pay a visit, see my old friend, Jim Kirk. You seen him around here? He’d be with some cute little blonde more than likely.”

Kirk pressed his lips together and his fists clenched around the blanket. “What do you want?”

“I want you to get out of that bed. I need a clear shot.”

Kirk’s eyes went wide and he drew closer to the Vulcan, using his body to shield him as best he could. “No. The only way you’re getting to him is through me.”

“I don’t understand you, Jim. He’s using you, don’t you see that? I’m here to save you from him.” Mitchell smiled and motioned Kirk away. “Now, come on, get out of the way.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about. Spock isn’t using me. I know exactly what I’m doing. Just leave, and we’ll forget this ever happened.”

“No!” Mitchell snarled, “I’m going to get rid of that freak once and for all!”

Spock stirred at the shout, but then settled back without waking. Kirk turned and looked at him, worry marring his brow, and then turned back to face Mitchell. “It was you, all along, wasn’t it?”

“What?” An innocent look settled on his face.

“You know what. All the attempts on Spock’s life.”

Mitchell grinned. “That’s right. Pretty smart of me to pin it on Galloway, even if I do say so myself. But Spock, he’s got more lives than a cat. He just wouldn’t die, no matter what I tried. But after our run-in with the other universe, I knew I had to get serious, make sure I got it right.”

“What does that have to do with anything?”

Kirk’s face took on a closed look, and suddenly Mitchell realized the truth. “You knew about them, didn’t you? What happened, Jim? Did that other Spock do something to you?”

Kirk shook his head. “No, it’s not what you think. He told me about them, that’s all.”

“So why didn’t you send him away? Knowing that he probably wanted the same thing? He’s perverted, Jim. You have to let me kill him!”

“Listen to me. I wanted it, too. I seduced _him_ , not the other way around.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“It’s true.” Kirk moved his hand back and pulled the Vulcan tighter against him. “Besides, if you kill him, I’ll die too.”

“What are you talking about?”

“We’re bonded, mentally. If one of us dies, the other one does, too. So you see, you can’t do this, not if you’re really concerned about me. Now put the weapon down and go back to the ship. We’ll work this out, I promise you.”

Mitchell lunged forward, striking Kirk across the face with his fist, “No! Why would you do something like that? _Why_?” He struck out again, and as Kirk lowered his head, his hand coming up to wipe away the blood from his split lip, the Vulcan finally roused.

“Jim?” Spock shook his head and pulled himself up into a sitting position. But his head remained down, as if any movement was a supreme effort. His eyes still closed, he reached for the man beside him. “Jim? What is wrong?”

Kirk looked at Mitchell and then turned, trying to get his companion to lie back down. “It’s okay, Spock. Go back to sleep.”

“No, something is wrong. You are in pain, I can feel it.”

Mitchell stepped forward, enraged, and grabbing Kirk by the hair, pulled him away from the Vulcan. “Don’t touch him! God damn freak!”

Spock’s eyes flew open and he looked at Mitchell with shock. His gaze then flew to Kirk and he fought to get up, trying to pull Kirk back out of Gary’s hold.

“Don’t even try it, “Mitchell placed the point of the weapon at Kirk’s temple. “Now, I want both of you to get up and get dressed. We’ve got a little trip to make and I don’t want to have to put up with you two like this.” He let go of Kirk and stepped back.

Both men got up and began to dress. More than once Spock stumbled and Kirk had to help him, holding him up as Spock struggled with his clothing.

“What the hell’s the matter with him?” Mitchell gave the Vulcan a contemptuous look.

“He’s weak from forming the bond. He needs rest, Gary. He shouldn’t be moving around.” Kirk’s arm was around Spock’s waist, the Vulcan’s slung over his bondmate’s shoulders. It was obvious that he was in no condition to travel.

“He’d better. I don’t totally buy this ‘bond’ thing. I’d hate to test it out. But I will, don’t think for a second I won’t.”

“I can travel,” Spock whispered, belying his own words.

Mitchell followed them down the stairs, the phaser never wavering from its site. Spock slightly stumbled half way down, but Kirk was able to right him before he brought them both down. Oddly enough, he wasn’t having as much trouble as he thought he would holding Spock up. The Vulcan was slender, but the heavier gravity of his home world had given him a denser bone and muscle structure. He only looked light. Could the bond somehow be helping him keep Spock upright? That really didn’t make sense, but Kirk didn’t know enough to say, and he wasn’t about to ask and give away the slight advantage it gave him. Let Mitchell think that he was tired from the strain, and maybe he would let his guard down enough for Kirk to make a move of some kind.

They finally made the aircar. Spock had fallen twice, the second time receiving a backhanded blow from the enraged Mitchell. Kirk had never seen him like this. Even when in the throes of his megalomania, Mitchell had been cool, aloof, not this madman who fluctuated between solicitous concern to an all-enveloping rage.

He forced Kirk to drive, putting Spock in the passenger seat. Mitchell got in the back and pressed the phaser to Spock’s temple. “Okay, Jim. Nice and easy. Bring us up,and head to the east...and don’t try anything funny. If it comes to it, you’re _both_ expendable.

“Where are we going?” Kirk started the vehicle, casting a glance behind him.

“Never mind. You’ll see when we get there. Just shut up and drive,” Mitchell leaned back but kept the phaser squarely aimed at Spock.

Kirk drove while trying to sneak a look at his bondmate. Spock looked okay, except for the bruise that was blossoming on the side of his face. But he had closed his eyes and slumped back in his seat. “You okay?” Kirk whispered.

“I am...weak. I have not had sufficient rest to overcome the effects of the bonding. Do not concern yourself so.”

But he was concerned, and when Mitchell finally ordered him to land the vehicle, thirty-five minutes and several changes in direction later, his first thought was that if Spock was unable to move fast enough to satisfy their captor, it could all be over.

They landed in front of a large building off by itself on the edge of the large city near the starbase. It looked like some sort of warehouse, its low-slung, nondescript facade broken only by the large sign that hung over the wide double doors at its front.

“Eternal Travels,” Kirk read. “This is the company your friend works for, isn’t it?”

“That’s right.” Mitchell got down from the ‘car, and motioned the two men out. “Poor Tina actually liked working for this outfit.”

Kirk, in the process of helping Spock down, froze. “’Poor Tina?’ Why ‘poor’?”

Mitchell grabbed the keys away from Kirk and turned to the doors, trying to find one that fit the lock. “Some women just don’t know when to shut up. She thought she could tell me what I could or couldn’t do. Dumb bitch, tried to stop me from leaving... said she’d call the authorities. I had to shut her up, she would have ruined everything. Hell, you’d think she would have been glad. Her friend was really disappointed when you didn’t come along.”

“Where _is_ Kelly?” He had to keep Mitchell talking. Maybe it could give them a chance to find some way out of this. Kirk got Spock out of the ‘car, his almost dead weight making walking difficult.

“How the hell should I know? Now, get inside.” Mitchell pushed them forward, as he finally managed to get the doors open.

Inside, the building was dark and cold. A warehouse, the vast interior was stacked with caskets in various stages of packaging—and row after row of cylindrical containers that looked like reconfigured photon torpedo housings.

“What are we doing here?” The place gave Kirk the creeps, and he felt a chill, like the premonition of a conceivable fate, crawl up his spine. He shivered, and pulled Spock closer.

“You’ll see. Tina brought me here one time. Showed me around.” Mitchell talked as he maneuvered them toward the back, going ever deeper into the cavernous room. “She said that the bodies were stored here, in stasis tubes, until they had a large enough load to make a run. Do you know what happens when you put a living person into a stasis tube, Jim?”

Kirk knew, and now he knew what Mitchell had in store for Spock. A living death. Alive, but not. He wouldn’t allow it. Even if it meant his own death, he wasn’t going to let Gary do that to the man who was now his life.

They reached the back of the room, coming to an area obviously set up to do the somewhat gruesome work of unpacking the corpses from their caskets and placing them in the stasis tubes. Kirk noticed a table off to the side loaded down with tools to aid in the work.

“Don’t even think about it,” Mitchell warned, glancing at the table and then back at Kirk. “I don’t want you dead, but that won’t stop me from phasering you out of existence if I have to.”

Kirk backed up, holding Spock up as best he could. “Don’t do this, Gary.”

“Why not? You can’t possibly really want this thing he’s done to you. Besides, he had no business doing it in the first place, chaining you to him.” Mitchell glared at him. “You were my friend first, ‘til he came along and ruined everything. You know what that other Kirk told me, the one from that other universe? That his Spock killed my counterpart. And do know why? Because that Mitchell tried to get his friend back. So you see, I have to get Spock out of the way, for my own good as well as yours.”

“That is not true,” Spock gasped out. He wavered and fell to his knees, his arm around Kirk’s waist the only thing holding him up.

“Spock, it’s all right. It doesn’t matter. “Kirk helped his bondmate up, surprised at the vehemence of Spock’s tone.

“Yes, it matters. It matters a great deal. No Vulcan, not even of that brutal universe would kill for such a reason. I, too, spoke with the Kirk of that place. Mitchell was killed for daring to defile the bond that existed between my counterpart and his captain.”

Kirk stared at Spock, almost afraid to ask. “How did he do that, defile their bond?”

“He drugged and then raped Kirk. Why do you think the man took such pleasure in toying with Mr. Mitchell when he went against orders to speak to him?” Spock turned to Mitchell. “Yes, Mr. Mitchell, I knew of your conversation with him. He made a point to tell me of it. His Mitchell was out of reach, slain by his bondmate before Kirk could seek his own revenge. He felt it fitting that you assume some of the punishment, you who could so easily betray your own friend and captain.” Spock was trembling, from anger or weakness, Kirk wasn’t sure which.

“Shut up! Just shut up! I don’t want to hear anymore from you!” Mitchell was enraged, his face beat-red. “I want you over there, NOW!” He motioned to the empty stasis tube, open and ready.

Kirk pulled Spock closer. It couldn’t end now, not like this. Once Spock was forced into the tube and it was sealed, there was no guarantee that he would come out alive. In fact, the odds were against it. The machines weren’t made for the living.

Ever so slowly, he half carried, half supported his lover as they moved toward Mitchell. He tried not to look at the knives so close, their salvation if he could only get close enough.

Once within his reach, Mitchell grabbed Spock’s arm and pulled him away from Kirk, shoving him toward the open casing. “Get in there, you freak.”

Spock stumbled, his hand reaching out for support. Mitchell was caught off guard when Spock swiftly righted himself and grabbed the phaser from his hand, the Vulcan’s other arm coming around to capture him.

“Spock, watch out!” Kirk lunged forward, trying to help the now struggling Vulcan as he tried to position the man in his arms for a neck-pinch, while at the same time keeping Mitchell from regaining his weapon. Kirk grabbed at the flaying hands, his face inches from Mitchell’s. Suddenly, horror transfixed him. Mitchell’s eyes had flared to life, that silver-metal glow that had haunted Kirk’s dreams, returning after the long months of quiescence.

Without thought, Kirk grabbed one of the knives from the table and plunged it into Mitchell’s chest, burying it to the hilt in his friend’s heart.

The light of Mitchell’s power, of his life, faded and died.

^^^^^

Spock entered his quarters and walked over to the bed. He knew he would find Kirk here, nursing his injured spirit within the red-warm cocoon.

“Jim?” He sat down on the edge of the bed and leaned over his lover.

“I’m all right, Spock. Just thinking.”

“Of your friend?”

“Yeah. He was my friend, once upon a time. I can’t just forget that.” Kirk brought his arm up to cover his eyes. “Jesus, all that blood...”

The knife had sliced into Mitchell, the blood gushing forth for the few moments that life had held, before his heart had stilled. The three men had frozen into a grisly tableau, held together by memories, and pain...and death. Finally, Kirk had let go, a sob pulled from him as he turned away. Spock had gently lowered the fallen man to the floor. They had found a communicator in the aircar and called the authorities.

The sun was barely rising as statements were taken, procedures met. Mitchell’s body was taken to the morgue and the two men returned to the ship.

“You had no alternative, t’hy’la. If he had lived many more would have died.”

“I know that. That doesn’t change what I did.” Kirk pulled his arm down and took Spock’s hand. “And you? How are you doing?” He pushed at Spock’s bangs.” You had me going there, you know that, don’t you?”

Spock nodded. It had bothered him, wondering if Kirk would take it as a lack of faith, that he had hid his real condition. He had not been as weak as he had led on. “It was not my intent to mislead you, but there was no way for me to let you know.”

“I understand. When did you know he was there?”

“Almost from the first. I was awake, but I felt it best to ‘play possum’, as the good doctor would say, until I could ascertain Mr. Mitchell’s design.”

“Spock.” Kirk frowned slightly. “Why didn’t you ever tell me about Gary? About him talking to the other Kirk?”

Spock shrugged slightly, uncomfortable with the direction the conversation had taken. “I was..afraid.”

“Afraid?” Kirk’s voice conveyed his obvious surprise.

“He was your friend, your ‘best’ friend, and though we had begun to draw close, I was still aware that he held a special place in your heart. I feared that if I said anything disparaging against him, you would turn from me, withdraw your friendship. That, I could not have stood.”

“But if what you told me was true...”

“I could not completely ascertain if what I believed was out of my concern for Mr. Mitchell’s behavior, or if I was magnifying the problem in my own mind because of the jealousy I felt for him.”

“You were jealous?”

“Yes. He had what I desperately wanted. When I first realized the depth of my feelings for you, I wondered at my antipathy toward him. After our mission on Gamma Seginus II...” Spock gazed intently at Kirk. “I knew something had grown between us. And I feared doing anything that would jeopardize its future. I am sorry.”

He brought his hand up and ran it through Spock’s hair. “I don’t think it would have mattered in either case. Whether I believed you or not, Mitchell would still have had to die...and I would still have loved you.”

Spock smiled, and took Kirk’s hand to place a kiss on its palm. “I will remember that.”

“Good.“ Kirk sat up and swung one leg off the bed. He turned to face his bondmate, his bent knee pressed against Spock’s hip. “Is McCoy back?”

“Yes, that is what I came to tell you. He returned minutes ago and wishes to see us both. He said to inform you that he will be here within the half hour.”

“I guess I better get up, then.” Kirk rose and headed for the bathroom, picking up his shirt where he had tossed it earlier and shrugging it on. He splashed water on his face and ran a comb through his hair, all the while studying his bondmate in the mirror.

Spock lifted an eyebrow. “Is there something amiss?”

“No,” Kirk walked out and headed for the front area. “I was just wondering if McCoy said anything...about you and me.”

“Our relationship.”

“Yeah, it’s not like Bones not to make his feelings known, even if it’s none of his business.” Kirk said without rancor. “It’s been days, now.”

“He did not specifically mention it, but I received the distinct impression that he expects a full report at our earliest convenience.”

“He does have a way about him, doesn’t he? Well, there’s no time like the present. We’ll get his report, and then give him ours. How’s that sound?”

“That would be acceptable,” Spock replied.

The sat quietly after that, speaking of inconsequential things until McCoy showed up. When he buzzed his presence, Spock got up and met him as he entered the cabin. “Jim is awake. I have not told him of your findings.”

McCoy frowned and walked over to his captain, taking a seat across from where Kirk had positioned himself at Spock’s terminal. He had just returned from the planet surface, having insisted on participating in Mitchell’s autopsy.

Spock sat at Kirk’s side, lending the support he knew his bondmate would need.

“Okay, Bones, give. What’d you find out?” Kirk leaned back, his shoulder touching Spock’s chest.

McCoy looked down for a moment and licked his lips. “I really messed up, Jim. You’ll never know how sorry I am about that.”

“Doctor, there is no way—”

“Let me finish, Spock. I should have been more vigilant. Instead, I let my sympathy for Gary blind me to changes that should have clued me in, made me see that something was going on with him.”

“His powers,” Kirk interjected.

“Yeah, it turns out that we only destroyed the symptom, not the cause. His brain was already changed so much, there was no way we could have brought him back to normal. All it did was find another way, a new route to manifest its powers.”

“I thought you were monitoring him.”

“I was. Nothing ever showed up. Talk about a surprise. When we opened up the cranial cavity...sorry, Jim.”

Kirk grimaced. “Go ahead.”

“It was like something was growing in there, taking him over day by day.” The doctor sighed. “I guess Gary was right, he should have died that day. Who knows how many lives would have been different if he had. That poor girl’s down there, that’s for sure.”

“Tina Lewis. Did they find her?” Kirk looked at Spock. “You talked to the lead detective, didn’t you?”

“Yes, I did. He has agreed to forward a report once the investigation is completed. But he did advise me that the young lady was found in her apartment.” He hesitated. “Her throat had been cut.”

“Dear god,” Kirk swore and got up. He walked over to the cabinet where Spock kept a flask of brandy for his consumption. “Care for a shot, Doctor?”

“Sure, I could use a drink right about now.”

Spock watched Kirk pour the drinks and carry them over. He knew his bondmate and the doctor would more than likely make a night of it, grieving, and coming to terms with, the death of their friend. The human had not asked for what had happened to him and, ultimately, had been just as much a victim of his powers as the rest of them.

Perhaps he would even join them in one final toast to Gary Mitchell. If in his madness Mitchell had destroyed life, he had also, in his attacks on Spock, been partially responsible for bringing to fruition the love Spock now shared with Kirk.

He stood up and retrieved a glass, a slight smile playing across his lips at the look of surprise on his lover’s face. He would drink a toast to what had been lost...and gained.

Finis


End file.
